Jersey Shore

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now!
Nice Guys Finish Last

Back at da club, it's on to the next for Vinny. He sets his sights on a dancer named Ramona that he deems worthy of taking on a date and introducing to his family. He tells her he loves her and talks about wanting to romance her. She falls for it hook, line, and sinker. Likewise Pauly finds a Cuban girl he thinks is more a one-night smash, so he doesn't ask her back to the house. The next day they both call their girls and ask them on a double date. As you might imagine, Vinny is super-adorable, asking Ramona to be his "sympathy date" since Pauly has a girl lined up. She eats it up, and Vinny whoops and hollers after they hang up at his victory. On the other hand, Pauly cockily tells his lady friend that Vinny has a date, and she can "come along, too." She laughs and says she'll come. It's a perfect encapsulation of both of their styles.

That afternoon you know it's serious when they head out to get haircuts, new outfits (not T-shirts!) and beautiful bouquets for the date. Unfortunately, once they get home Ramona calls and smashes Vinny's little heart. She stutters out that she doesn't want to come, and he doesn't give her a second to explain further before slamming down the phone. Ronnie heads out to the patio to console him, but Vinny clams up because he feels slighted after treating Ramona as well as he would treat his mother. Pauly even comes out to join them before he has blown out his hair. And with that my most secret dream has come true! I didn't dare utter the words for fear they wouldn't come true, but seeing Pauly D sans fards (or whatever the hair gel equivalent is -- sans spikes?) was one of my goals for this season. But I digress... Pauly's choice to expose his curly underbelly shows how crushed our Vinny is. Ronnie tells Vinny to pick up the pieces and call another girl. Pauly encourages that he might actually ending up liking his back-up. Then Ronnie, like the pig he is, says, "Even if you don't, you'll probably still fuck her." Pauly: "Ooooooh!"

Apropos of that, Angelina and Jose hang out inside while everyone gets ready. She smugly tells Jose how Vinny got rejected. People in glass casas, girl. But the fat lady hasn't sung on this one, because Vinny does Ronnie's advice one better and calls Ramona back. Before you know it, he's convinced her to come out on the date. I'm not going to lie, my heart is swelling a bit. In your face, Angelina!

Pauly's date arrives first, and he admits he's nervous for the first time in a long time. They head on to the restaurant to flirt and eat calamari while Vinny waits for Ramona, who's late. Not a good sign. After a while, Vinny doesn't get an answer when he calls her, and everyone reaches the tragic conclusion that Vinny's been stood up. He sits at home and mopes while everyone heads out for the night. The flowers lie on his bed, slowly dying.

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Jersey Shore




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