Tour time! Big shocker, Snooki is unenthusiastic about anything that requires the slightest bit of effort and isn't accompanied by liquor. Sitch is similarly bothered to realize that a walking tour involves actual walking. They do get excited when the guide, an adorable roly poly of a man with a hobo beard, shows them the building where Leonardo da Vinci painted the Mona Lisa. Vinny responds in a typical Jersey/Staten fashion: "Get the fuck outta here! Pass that shit every day!" Next they see the David statue, and Deena comments, "I would do him." Exactly the response Michelangelo was hoping to elicit all those years ago. Snooki, on the other hand, thinks he's not guido-y enough and "his wiener doesn't cut it."
They head into a church, where they see frescoes with cherubs. Snooki asks, "So they're real? The babies with wings?" As the tour continues, Sitch continues to distance himself from the group in the most blatant, five-year-old brat kind of a way. He literally sits down at every chance and puts a sour expression on his face. His roommates only notice to the extent that they're murmuring to themselves that he should stop being such a damn weirdo. Pauly says, "We're not gonna hold his hand. That's all I know."
The kids says "Ciao" to their tour guide and load into a van to head to a place atop the hill where they can take in the view and have a cocktail. Pauly wraps his arm around Vinny's shoulder like a lover and asks, "This is beautiful, huh babe?" Vinny says serenely, "Yeah, it is." Then they get fruity drinks, entwine their arms, and take a picture sipping and gazing into each other's eyes. I'm pretty sure the Italian for bromance is l'amore fraterno, but I don't even think that begins to cover it.
As night falls, Vinny sums it up in the Hemingwayesque prose of a guido: "Ahhhh, well... Italy was... interesting." As is contractually obligated, they sit around reminiscing. About JWOWW and Snooki's street brawl. About Snooki throwing a wine bottle at Sitch's head. Snooki wonders what would have happened if she had hit him. He says he would have gone to the hospital. Deena: "Again!" Snooki notes they're all enjoying each other's company (even Sitch) and thinks this is as perfect a last night in Italy as they could want. Hoping to make things even better, Sitch takes the moment to apologize to everyone for all his misdeeds and buy the ladies flowers. They thank him to his face, but JWOWW thinks it's a case of "same shit, different country."