Jersey Shore
Damage Is Done

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B- | Grade It Now!
About Last Night...

In Sicily, the guys eat tons and tons of food. Good to know that a generation and a transatlantic migration doesn't change some things.

Tuscany. Drunk Snooki and Deena mount a motorcycle and topple the thing, giggling all the way. Deena estimates they went through a good 10 bottles of wine that day. They get on the bus to hit up the next winery as Snooki randomly announces, "I'm horny!" Still? They get to the next location, and Snooki start to feel the drunk sleepies. As the guy expounds on the various types of wood they use to barrel the wine, Snooki literally takes on nap on some of these aforementioned barrels. All the guy can do is laugh at how fucking rude she is. Ugly Americans. Somehow a question about which wine or cheese JWOWW wants prompts a snide response from saucy Snooki, and it begins. Sammi suspects at least some of the tension stems from the fact the JWOWW knows Snooki isn't being honest about what happened with Sitch, and JWOWW eventually insinuates as much. Snooki's argument is basically, "You're my bestie, so you need to lie, cheat and steal to make me happy." JWOWW's is, "Well then stop being a grubby bitch." At which point Snooki literally runs away, sprinting into the streets of Tuscany. Where is she going? Who knows? Eventually, of course, they all have to reconvene in the bus, and the tension is so thick you'd need one of those can-cutting knives to get through it.

Sicily. They're. Still. Eating. Sitch asks, "I wonder what the girls are up to right now," and Ronnie can only laugh because he's seen enough bullshit drama over the past two years to know that it has a tendency of bleeding from one situation to another.

The girls arrive home. Snooki declares, "Me and Jenni are not on good terms right now." Similarly, JWOWW says she's done covering for Snooki and putting up with her foul, self-centered attitude. All this said, about five minutes later, Snooki calls out to JWOWW from the bathroom and ostensibly squashes it. They hug and say they love each other and generally psycho babble at each other like a junior high group therapy session. Well that was a non-event.

A bit later, Snooki calls her dad to hash things out. Papa Snooki bears the bad tidings that Jionni has changed his Facebook status to "Single." Snooki cries. Her dad consoles her: "You didn't cause this. He caused this." And perhaps that's where Snooki gets her deluded ways from. She completely caused this. That doesn't mean Jionni isn't an overreacting, emotionally abusive prick, but Snooki's actions were still what put the wheels in motion on this whole debacle. And that's just what we've seen caught on camera in the last couple of days. That doesn't even take into account various accusations that are flying around.

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Jersey Shore




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