Jersey Shore
Free Vinny

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now!
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A Swarm of Bitches

The next day, Sitch strongly considers giving Paula a "second date" as he shoves her out the door. Snooki joins him out on the patio for a smoke, and he says they had a relatively chaste roll in the hay last night. He may actually like her! (Or, in his words, "I haven't found one thing wrong with her yet." Good enough.) Snooki supports the coupling of Sitch and Paula. I can't imagine it's more than her overwhelming desire to get Sitch off her case because, really, who would wish him on a girl? She does also admit, "I would fuck Paula." But wouldn't Deena be jealous?

The day settles in, and the roommates realize there is a Vinny-sized hole in all their hearts. They are bored, listless and generally uncertain what to do with himself in his absence. Since they have nothing going on, they decide to engaged in a little GTGVB -- "Gym, Tan, Get Vinny Back." They pile into the car and set the GPS for Staten Island. Pauly is so excited. He rubs his hands together and announces, "I'm going to get my boyfriend!"

They make a quick detour by the Store Shore to tell Danny, who is excited enough to allow them to waste his precious shirts and iron-on letters making shirts with such phrases as "VINNY, YOU'RE COMING HOME!" (JWOWW), "WHERE'S YOUR BEARD? - TEAM VINNY" (Ronnie), "VINNING ALL DAY" (The Situation), and "FREE VINNY - WHERE'S MY BITCH?" (Pauly).

They arrive at the house and start pounding on the door like crazy people. The "WHERE'S MY BITCH?" shirt is suddenly very fitting. After a few minutes, though someone answers the door, and the kids barrel into the house uninvited like it's a damn guido drug bust. Fortunately for everyone involved, they do find Vinny in his room and proudly show off all their shirts like four-year-old offering up the world's tackiest macaroni necklaces. Vinny shows off his own handiwork from the last few days -- a massive tattoo on his upper chest that says "LET GO ~ LET GOD." The girls all "Awwwww!" at the sentiment, and Ronnie scratches his head in confusion (what's new?).

Either way, everyone agrees he looks reinvigorated and that the week home did him a world of good. Vinny goes to say goodbye to his tearful mom, and Snooki assures her, "We'll take care of him, I promise." Vinny knows he's not totally out of the woods, but he thinks he's better equipped to carry on with his recovery back at the Shore House. With that, it's a Saturday night, and their minds are already on where they're going out. My mind is on this. And all is right with the world once again!

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Jersey Shore

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