Another day breaks, bringing DMV (Deena, Mike and Vinny) to the T-shirt shop. Is it possible that this job is even more lame than the gelato shop? Short answer: Yes. The high point occurs when Sitch skips out on the job to get a bagel sandwich. Riveting stuff. Really.

The busy bees head home, where Snooki is randomly -- and of her own, screwball volition -- bouncing up and down on a couch as she smokes a cigarette. Deena suggests an impromptu game of roof kickball. They get in a solid 10 or 20 minutes before the ball inevitably flies over the railing and lands on a neighbor's roof. Instead of calling one of the guys to retrieve, they rig up a dwarf-dwarf-broom system that is doomed to fail from the moment it was conceived. Perhaps intuitively sensing that he can get a good view of Deena's booty-shorted ass, Vinny heads up and devises a MacGyver-esque contraption largely consisting of beer bongs tubes and succeeds in retrieving the ball. Miracles happen every day, folks.

That evening, Ronnie hatches an escape plan with Sitch, completely unaware that Sammi is sipping and snooping. She invites herself along, and Sitch's face falls. Because Sammi foiled Ronnie's plans for a guys' night out, the trip to the boardwalk becomes a household affair. Sammi, whose name should really be "Sour Grapes" instead of "Sweetheart," is dour as usual, snitting, "I don't want to be having fun with these people." Don't worry, honey, you've made that option all but impossible with your jacked-up attitude. As they head out of the house, Snooki pauses at a mirror, beholds herself in a glittery pink cowboy hat and mismatched pink and black polka dot socks, wondering aloud, "What the fuck am I wearing?" My thoughts exactly, Snickers.

And so the gang returns to the boardwalk, where the seeds of this moment's discontent were sowed less than two years ago. Sammi continues her campaign of misery by taking a pass on the rides and sneering at the guys and their horseplay. She shadows Ronnie desperately, denies his invitations to join group activities, then moans, "I feel so alone!" Ronnie eventually gets sick of her moping and tells her to "get the fuck over it already."