Indeed, I was right! At home, Pauly grabs Deena up in his arms and rocks her around as he mischievously admits he ate the cake. Cut to film footage as proof. Meanwhile, I want Pauly to eat my cake so he'll wrap me up in his tacky tattooed arms like that. And by "eat my cake," I do indeed mean eat my cake. Hubba hubba. Deena feels bad she jumped to the Situation and has to admit that, in this case, his lunatic paranoia is founded. She admits as much to him and apologizes for blaming him, so what does he do? Throw it in her face and continue to rant about how "good" he's been these last few weeks. Oh yeah, and he's on a diet. He's very insistent he's on a diet. Meanwhile, who would go on a diet while filming this show? It's like vowing celibacy right before you join a sex colony. Anyway, Sitch says (for the seven trillionth time) that he only gets attention when he's being bad, so "Mean Mike" might as well come out. Are they just looping this same clip into every episode, or did they really get him to say this same bullshit line over and over again? From my scattered, vague recollections, I feel like he's worn several different shirts while making this statement. Maybe they just had him change in rapid-fire and repeat the same mission statement over and over again? I won't lie, though, if I were getting 100 grand an ep, I would say them in a box. I would say them with a fox. I would say them in a house, I would say them with a mouse. I would say them here or there. I would say them anywhere.
Sitch heads to the duck phone to get back-up. His friend Second-Fiddle Bobby informs him The Unit is still in Florida, which deeply disappoints old Sitchy: "Looks like the master plan is derailed for another night." [Ed. note: terms "master" and "plan" used very loosely].
Somehow he manages to pick up the pieces of his Unit-broken heart and head out to Karma with his roomies (who are looking extra tittylicious tonight, no?). He spots Bobby and asks, "How the hell are you, you big monkey?" That is going to be my new one-size-fits-all greeting. LOVE. IT.