Jersey Shore
No Shame, Good Integrity

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: C | Grade It Now!
And Now For Celibacy

Back at the house, Vinny's outside cleaning his shoes when Deena comes out to talk and apologize for crying so much. She tries to explain that Chris is her best friend and a part of her. Vinny's like, "He's not a part of you, though. You're two individuals." He tells her that's unhealthy. Not unhealthy in a fighting, Ron-and-Sam way, but unhealthy that she thinks she can't go on without him. Deena tells Vinny she has anxiety and a chemical imbalance, and he asks her to stop guessing that she has this or that. She asks if he likes Chris and he tells her to shut up. Which, let's face it, we all wanted to say.

Everyone's asking Snooki about her wedding plans (there are none). Vinny thinks he and Jionni should be friends, but she thinks maybe he shouldn't make jokes about being the father if he wants that. Vinny's like, "I don't make them to him." Yeah, he'd be a good friend. Ron asks what they have in common and Vinny says they're Eskimo brothers. Pauly explains to us that means you hooked up with the same chick. And he also explains that pretty much all of the guys in the house are Eskimo brothers. Nice. They move on to ask Snooki about Lamaze classes, and Vinny wants to go with her. She says no, because Ron is going. Vinny's like, "Come on! The joke's over. I'm not the father." But he seems legitimately dejected that he can't go with her. Um, why isn't Jionni going? He can come to take her on dates, but not to Lamaze? Vinny says that he and Nicole had sex for a half-second, but the mention pisses Snooki off. Mike realizes that if Vinny keeps this up, he might become Public Enemy No. 1 instead of The Situation.

Next day, Pauly, Deena and Snooki head to work at the store and they aren't even late; they're two minutes early. Snooki wants to make up for being a bad employee, and swears she's going to be really good this year. She talks to Danny about the possibility of living on her own, so she can get rest and stay healthy during her pregnancy. He says he has a couple other places, but most are taken. However, he happens to have the apartment right next to their place available, so he's going to let her move in there. She thinks it's great that Danny understands and cares. She asks if she can go on break now and he's exasperated. "No! Make a sale."

The girls go to lunch and Snooki tells everyone she's pissed at Vinny. She also plans to tell Jionni about it all, because they're engaged. The girls give her advice on talking to Vinny about it. Snooki makes a trademark "My water broke" joke. And then they go shopping. Snooki wants these cute skinny clothes and Sam asks if they don't make them for pregnant women. Snooki: "Wait till you're pregnant. Maternity World is not cute."

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Jersey Shore




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