As the kids head out, the Meatballs show off their runway walks, incognizant of the fact that even standing on each other's shoulders, they wouldn't be tall enough to model for real. Also Deena sings for at least the second time this episode. Has she turned into Jess from New Girl? That barely works for Zooey Deschanel, so I don't recommend it for Deena.
They arrive at Jenk's and, as predicted, Sitch jumps ship almost immediately with a mantourage of randoms that he claims are his bros. He also claims he's "native" to this area, which is not technically true (he grew up an hour away). Whatever, we can't be asked to worry about it because we have Snooki's urinary tract to consider. She has self-diagnosed an infection in her nether regions. Well, either that or pregnancy -- which warrants a "Bish, pleez" look from Deena. Indeed, Deena is quite the task mistress -- Snooki asks, "If I piss blood, can we go to the doctor tonight?" Deena doesn't mull it over for even half a second before shutting her down: "No, tomorrow." It's a good thing JWOWW was more generous of time and spirit back in Italy. Snooki gets her UTI on, then leaves the bathroom, this time making a proclamation that she isn't washing her hands. Deena validates her, saying, "Yeah, I don't ever do it." Dicks of the world, you've been warned. Then Snooki draws on her extensive medical experience as a vet tech to prescribe herself a treatment plan of Lots o' Shots. I'm not sure why she thinks something she does every day anyway will suddenly have medicinal properties, particularly something that will only make her pee a lot when it burns to do so, but to each her own. Finally, I cannot move on to the next scene without mentioning that this entire scene basically was underscored by polka music. Amazing.
Outside, the gang is ready to move on. Everyone except Sitch, that is. As they go to the batting cage for more group bonding, he stays back to scam on chicks. It was probably the right decision because their baseball outing was pretty lame. They cross paths again with Sitch in time for him to join them in the cab on the way home. Sitch spends the ride complaining that people gang up on him. It's kind of a ridiculous turn of events because this is the most honest, open and authentic The Situation has been in 55 episodes, and yet it is the least interesting or sympathetic he's ever been. Like, who cares? Get back to wearing all white track suits and sunglasses at night indoors. Go back to pulling up your shirt and talking about zoo animals. Dance, monkey, dance! Deena and Snooki feel pretty much the same way, it seems. They acts like they're on his side as they encourage him to talk it out with the other guys, but you can't tell me that deep down they don't just want to see him get caught up in the same bullshit that he regularly tosses them into. And he totally falls for it.













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