The next morning, Sitch calls a bagel place to order dinner. We learn a few things: Pauly likes chocolate chip bagels, someone eats home fries, and Ronnie's preferred sports drink is yellow Gatorade. Who knew these people rocked so many carbs? Sitch continues his "I'm nice, I swear!" campaign by paying for the order. Which is all well and good, but when the kid arrives with the food, none of the roommates have any cash, so Sitch tips him with... drum roll... a packet of protein powder! I am not making this up. He laughs at what an a-hole he's being, and the kid is all, "What is this?" Sitch explains and then basically shuts the door in the kid's face. He claims he's being helpful and that, "In the guido world, protein is like money!" I'm guessing there's going to be some spit (and God knows what else) mixed in to their cream cheese next time they order delivery.

After the kids eat breakfast, JWOWW enlists Sammi and Deena to join her at the sex shop to prepare for her one-year anniversary date with Roger. She explains, "Nothing says 'romance' like Clone-a-Pussy and handcuffs." Can't argue with that!

Deena is likewise excited for her date with Joey, but JWOWW and Sammi are skeptical about him. Deena thinks they're raining on her parade. Plus, if she doesn't get some action soon, while JWOWW is making a mold of her vagina for Roger, Deena's vagina will actually be molding.

Meanwhile, Sitch, Snooki, and Ronnie are at the Shore Store. In an odd turnabout, Sitch actually works. Standing behind the counter, yelling like a carnival barker and tossing around T-shirts, he proves that, when he puts a single ounce of effort into anything, he can really be on his game -- though when he classifies his work as being of "mythical proportions," that might be stretching it. For Snooki's part, she continues to be a Meatball-shaped lump, eating takeout, talking about how she's going to bang Jionni later, and actually refusing to work when Danny asks. Hey, someone's got to balance out Sitch's uncharacteristic can-do spirit.

Elsewhere, Pauly and Vinny head out to shoot pool and bemoan the lack of single people in the house. Pauly gripes about JWOWW taking over the Smush Room and decorating it all classy for her anniversary (how dare she!). "I feel like I need to be in a relationship in this house." Vinny: "That's why we're in a relationship."