Bonus footage: Wet T-shirt contest at the Shore Store! Danny is nothing if not professional -- also, pretty handy with a water balloon.
Shore House. Title card: "GO TIME." Which is kind of false advertising because we spend several minutes seeing Pauly and Vinny come up empty-handed while Deena tries and fails yet again to get a straight answer out of Joey. Whether he's genuinely offended by the accusation or just walking away from her to save himself the trouble of lying, I think we can all agree that his assessment of Deena as annoying is 100% correct -- specifically right now but also in general. After Deena chases Joey around the club nagging him for several minutes, she gives up and leaves, validated that she will have to once against take up residence on the corner of Victimhood Row and Lonelyheart Avenue. As she leaves, Joey watches her go with an impassive look on his face. I'm not sure if he cares or not, though his friend does counsel him, "Don't worry about her." Maybe he did care after all? Then again, not even I care at this point, so... moving on!
Which is exactly what the two straggling Karma couples are doing as they make their way back to the house. Instead of focusing all his penile energy on JWOWW, Roger whispers sweet guido nothing into Ronnie's ear, telling him, "I'm going to come in [your room], and I'm going to slap [my dick] on your forehead!" Ummmmm... okay.
Back outside da club, Unit is falling-down drunk and clearly in no position to stage some Sitch-iavellian ambush. They walk home, shirtless and embracing as Sitch gives Unit a pep talk about sobering up and preparing for war. Except that makes it sound a lot more macho and a lot less homoerotic than it is. Like, he's literally talking about changing his clothes. Next thing you know he'll be offering him sweat pants and spraying Unit down with Axe. Like, that is where this is going. And something tells me that Unit will be down for more than cuddling. He actually says, "I just need to get you a little more sober so you can handle some of my business." I think he even notices how ridiculous it sounds as the innuendo crosses his lips. Then again, Sitch basically thinks everything he says is a mixture of Eddie Murphy hilarity, Sun Tzu strategery, and Shakespearian eloquence, so he could just be chuckling a congratulation to himself for another brilliant turn of phrase. Unit is certainly in no shape to respond.