Jersey Shore
Toxic Shots Syndrome

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: C- | Grade It Now!
"There Aren’t That Many Class Acts In Seaside"

Shore Store. Deena feels sick and is totally emotional. She goes to the bathroom and throws up. You know, it might be because she went off her diet and ate a bunch of rich food on her date. But Sam worries that they might have two pregnant Meatballs on their hands. Work day is over, so Deena goes home to lie down. She has shooting pains in her stomach, and thinks she has Toxic Shock Syndrome. Which she pronounces "Toxic Shock Shyndrome." JWOWW tells her she'd have to have a tampon in for a long time, and Deena says she left one in all day yesterday and then today. JWOWW's incredulous, but Deena tells her she took it out AND PUT IT BACK IN. Um, MTV is clearly not paying these people enough if they have to reuse tampons. Also, poor Chris. Deena says she doesn't know the symptoms, so JWOWW tells her to read the tampon pamphlet. As she does this, JWOWW voices over that Deena's a hypochondriac and is all worried just because she left her tampon in for 18 hours. "Every girl has been there." Which... really? I don't think I know anyone who has left a tampon in for 18 hours. Also: Am I really recapping this? Deena thinks she has TSS because it says you can have a rash that looks like a sunburn and she's already tan! Deena worries she'll die, but JWOWW says she won't let her. We can only hope she might die from this. But I see her in the "Coming Up" as we head into commercial, so no luck.

Deena survived the commercial break, so calls her mom and tells her she doesn't feel good. Her mom's response, "So you had a good night with Chris?" Deena says she did, but then she starts crying and says she's not herself and doesn't know why. Her mom lectures her in a total Italian mom voice. Deena says she's not like everybody else; she's not normal. But her mom says she is normal. Her mom tells her to go hang out with Sammi, which Deena says she's going to do. They head out to the lower deck to chat on the picnic table. Sam doesn't like seeing Deena like this, and really just misses the happy and fun Deena that she knows. Sam gets where Deena's coming from, because she's cried a lot in the house, too. Deena doesn't know how she'll be able to be a meatball by herself. Sam: "I will do my best to be a meatball." Ron comes out and pouts that Sam's not ready to go to dinner, so she goes upstairs and gets ready. He's still pouting when she's all done up and they head out. They old-school Ron-and-Sam fight in the car on the way there. This is such an unhealthy relationship. Ronni is borderline abusive.

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Jersey Shore




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