Previously: JWOWW took the frustrations of her foundering relationship out on the duck phone. Not cool! Sammi finally acknowledged what a wench she's been and apologized to Snooki and Deena. Snooki went on a vagina-flashing, beach-rolling, crowd-gathering bender that ended in the back of an SHPD cruiser.
We rejoin everyone's favorite drunken demi-dwarf as the po-po shove her bedraggled ass into the back of the cruiser. Deena and JWOWW cry in disbelief as they head home. JWOWW calls Snooki's dad to tell him what's happening. He lets out a groan and a "Shit!" She promises to call him when she bails out Snooki. JWOWW makes her next call to Tommy to apologize for not calling. She breaks into tears as she explains what's going down, and he reacts by screaming at her for being a bitch the night before. She slams down the duck phone and complains that this is a side she's never seen of him.
The guys get home, and Deena updates them on the shenanigans. Vinny says Snooki's hard partying ways are no longer funny. Now it's a problem. Throughout the conversation, Tommy tries to call JWOWW back, but she tells him to go fuck himself and ignores the rest of the calls. Someone from the police department calls to tell JWOWW she can pick up Snooki. Everyone goes in a show of solidarity, and Snooki laughs all the way home. Not unlike being punched in the face by a high school gym teacher, she admits this was an embarrassing moment but appreciates the support of her roommates.
Back home, JWOWW walks Snooki through her blackout and explains just how fucked up she was to earn the official distinction of "Public Nuisance." Flashbacks provide colorful examples of her traveling shit show. Amazingly, JWOWW has already been to the T-shirt shop and back to press her very own "FREE SNOOKI" tank top.
Snooki bites the bullet and calls her father. She understates that being in jail "wasn't fun." He reads her the riot act, telling her she should be embarrassed and needs to get her shit together. He vows to come personally pick her vagrant ass up next time she causes a scene. She puts on a baby voice, so he softens up. He does tell her he's disappointed, which she considers the worst thing he could say to her. He asks her to promise never to get in that position again. Interestingly, we don't hear her make those words. Editorial decision or self-awareness on Snooki's part? You be the judge.