Joan of Arcadia
Death Be Not Whatever

Episode Report Card
Deborah: A | 1 USERS: A+
Nor Yet Canst Thou Kill Me, Yo

Belated props to joanofdark, since I forgot last week.

Movie night at the Girardis' house. Mom enters with bowls of buttered and unbuttered popcorn. Will asks, "What about The Godfather?" Luke and Joan grumble since they've already seen it "like, 111 times." Dad insists, "There are nuances." Luke wants something funny. Will suggests Duck Soup. Joan refuses: "Nothing black and white!" Hey, now. Let's not be rash. Will suggests The Godfather: Part II. Kevin suggests they just argue about movies for two hours. I'm waiting for Will to suggest the third Godfather, the one Joe Mantegna was in, but he doesn't. Helen doesn't want anything sad because she doesn't want to cry. Joan complains that her mother cried when she saw Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Luke says it's becoming increasingly obvious that the only thing they all have in common is DNA. As Helen gets up to pull on a sweater, she notices a breaking news bulletin on the TV. They've got video footage of an incident that just occurred in downtown Arcadia: two white police officers are beating the hell out of a black man. Helen calls Will's attention to it. Will watches with dismay. It's not long before Will's pager goes off and the phone is ringing. Will says, "So much for movie night," as he answers the phone. Helen looks sad and Joan and Luke look disturbed as they watch the footage of the assault. Shortest opening yet, I think.

At school, there's a career fair going on, and the Misfit Posse drifts through, complaining. Grace: "What if you just want to live in your car? Where's the booth for that?" Adam: " have a car?" Grace replies, "It was an attempt at humour, Rove. And I told you about 'dude.'" Adam claims, "I tried 'yo.' It didn't take." Joan whines that she doesn't have time to think about her future right now. Grace asks Adam, "Is it just me or are you spacier than usual?" Adam mutters that he doesn't like November. Grace: "The whole month?" He sadly agrees. She asks what November ever did to him. I don't know about him, but ever since I started recapping, November is one of my least favourite months. Also, February and May -- sweeps months, all. But then, I always hated February, anyway; the weather's crap, and it's a sucky month, and my birthday's in February and it sucks to have your birthday during the crappiest winter month when you hate winter. ["It's my belief that that's why February is so short -- sucky month, bitch to spell, let's not drag it out." -- Sars] Grace asks about February. Joan says she hates February. Atta girl. I hope the November/February thing is a little sweeps in-joke from the writers. Grace wants to know what's with hating months: "That's, like, arbitrary." Hey, if anyone should grasp random hate, I'd think it would be Grace.

They run into Vice-Principal Price, who informs them, "The point of this afternoon is to pretend that you might one day make a valuable contribution to society. Perhaps you could play along. For example, Ms. Polk, you might want to look into journalism, which is a profession where they actually pay people to be cynical and disaffected." I'm hoping Grace won't let me down, and she doesn't. She sneers, "Not since all the publications got consumed by media conglomerates who manipulate information and --" Atta girl! Way to go all Manufacturing Consent on his ass. He gives her a little push and says, "Go!" Next he turns his attention to Adam, wondering what career he'd like to "explore." Adam says, "I want to do something...soulless and corporate, Mr. Price." I was hoping he'd do a variation on Lloyd Dobler's speech to Diane Court's dad in Say Anything when Lloyd's asked what he plans to do with his life. But this is fine, too. Price says, "Good choice," and claps him on the back, steering him off. Joan says she thinks she'll just "browse." Price makes a disapproving sound and moves on. He's got a full schedule of kids to hassle and he can't waste any more time here.

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Joan of Arcadia




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