Joan of Arcadia
Something Wicked This Way Comes

Episode Report Card
Deborah: A | 3 USERS: A+
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"But What's Puzzling You / Is The Nature Of My Game"

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Will, dressed for work, leans over his sleeping wife and kisses her gently, telling Helen she slept through two snooze alarms. Amateur. I can sleep through nine. She sits up with a start as Will tells her all the kids are already up. Helen: "I had the strangest dream. I saw Judith. She was in our kitchen." Will tells her she's been working too hard. Helen says she was making tea and Judith just walked through the kitchen. She doesn't tell Will about Judith walking through solid objects. "I could have sworn I was awake." Will feels her forehead but Helen assures him she's not sick. He kisses her hand and takes off. Frink: "She turns around and finds the cup." She turns to get out of bed, and notices the shiny chrome yellow mug on her night table. She picks it up and looks slightly freaked.

Joan and the Misfit Posse enter the cafeteria as she bemoans physics. She swears she studied and got decent marks: "But it's like I never even saw this stuff before." Luke: "Physics is hard to retain. It's counterintuitive to the way we day-to-day perceive the world. I mean, we ignore the quantum and trust the Newtonian. It's habit." As they arrive at their table, Grace says, "I have no idea what you just said." Friedman: "That's because men understand science better. They've done studies." Both Grace and Glynis slap him in the head. Hee. He howls slightly, and adds, to Glynis: "Not you. You don't count." She smacks him again. Slow learner, this boy. Glynis is wearing an intensely peach-coloured T-shirt with some kind of rainbow picture on it. Oy. If this show comes back -- and this episode made me sincerely hope it does -- I would like to see Mageina Tovah get more to do, and I'd really like to see Glynis dress less like the girls I was in sixth grade with in the mid-seventies. All right, okay, I had a pink T-shirt with a sparkly unicorn ironed onto it. ["Me too. My mother has a few things to answer for in the wardrobing department." -- Sars] Look, I'm pretty sure everybody in the fashion industry was on cocaine. I have no other explanation. Luke rambles on: "See, we don't fundamentally believe in subatomic probability. I mean, I do, but you know, I'm a science stud." Grace: "'Science' and 'stud' do not go together, dude." Well…do I have to link to those pictures of Richard P. Feynman again? How about Brian Greene? Richard Dawkins? Alex Toker? João Magueijo ? A young Jacques Cousteau? How about Berkeley biologist Tyrone Hayes? I'm just saying. Glynis contributes, "Jonas Salk had a very sexy jawline." From where I'm sitting, the man had next to no jawline, so I'm not sure what she's on about. Grace: "Why do you know that?" Glynis clearly wonders herself. Joan: "So you're all confident about the physics final?" Grace, whipping out a newspaper: "I don't study for finals. It's against the laws of anarchy." Adam: "How can there be laws of anarchy? I really need to update my portfolio so I can get an internship this summer, otherwise it's back to the hotel for me…a fate worse than death…" As Joan struggles with her juice container, she looks up and sees Rocky standing out in the hall just beyond in the doorway, in a white suit, glowing. There are wonky camera sound effects along with a vertigo shot of Joan and her freaked-outness. In the background, we can hear Grace saying she has to get a job, too, and that he father's threatening to make her work at the temple as a camp counsellor. Joan stands up, staring at Rocky, who turns and walks away. Sound back to normal, Grace asks, "Girardi…what's with the zombie look?" Like she's hypnotized, Joan replies, "I saw Rocky," and starts to walk out. Adam: "Wait, Rocky?" Luke: "Dead Rocky?" Grace: "Every year at this time, she breaks down. It's like her warranty's up."

She hustles down the hall looking for him. Rocky gets her attention as she's about to walk past him: "You looking for me, Joan?" She asks what he's doing there. He's not glowing anymore. He's wearing a red tie with his white suit. Apparently red and white are the favoured colours of the undead. Naturally, David Dorfman's aged a little in the last year and a half, and when you're barely into double digits, it's a bit more noticeable than when you're already an adult. Boy, if we continue aging after death, I dunno if I'm up for that. As they walk along, he says, "I wasn't sure you'd see me. Sometimes you don't." I presume if Joan can barely manage to see him, hardly anybody else can, and to others it must look like she's now walking down the hall talking to an invisible midget. Frink, on the other hand, wonders how she could have ever missed him, given that he's wearing a lighted white suit. She asks if he's around a lot. Rocky says he likes to check in. Joan: "What's going on? You and Judith don't know you're dead? I have to show you to the other side? Go to the light. That's my advice." Judging from his suit, he already is the light, Joan. He tells her she watches too many movies. Joan: "Why is this happening to me?" Rocky: "There's been a disturbance in your magnetic field. You'll understand it soon. I have to go now." He walks off into the trophy case, with all the sound and CGI effects. Joan: "Rocky! Rocky, wait." He just turns and gives her a kind of knowing look before disappearing into the ether. Joan walks up to the trophy case and pleads that she needs to know more. By this time, the Misfit Posse has caught up with her; they're all standing behind her looking either amused (Friedman) or concerned (everyone else). Joan turns around and giggles, saying, "I got you guys. I got you guys. Man, that was easy." They look unconvinced. What is Christopher Marquette wearing on his head? Someone's replaced his hair with the wig my mother used to wear in the early seventies when her hair wouldn't behave. Poor boy. He really has his share of bad hair days. Joan walks past them back to the cafeteria as Grace stares and says, "So not funny, dude."

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Joan of Arcadia

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