Joan of Arcadia
Joan of Arcadia

Episode Report Card
Deborah: B | 537 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
The Wages Of Sin

Joan: "We need my aunt's clothes back. It's an emergency!" PMVD: "I thought she died." Judith claims Joan's uncle is really mad. PMVD wants $500. Joan's outraged: "But you only gave us $400!" Let's see: they got $150 the first time, and had $36 left over. That's $114 spent on five coats for the homeless. Next time (or times) they must have gotten the balance -- $250 -- which is exactly what Joan told Friedman she had for the laptop. So…they pocketed $286 and spent $114? Nice. Thank God for the "invisible hand of social justice." What is it, a fist? PMVD: "It's called capitalism, dear. I'm entitled to something for my trouble." Judith: "We were helping the homeless." PMVD: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice -- oh, no, not her." He looks toward the door. Joan sees her mother barrelling in, and she and Judith dash aside and pretend to be looking at clothes before Helen sees them. She holds up the coat and asks PMVD, "Where did you get this?" PMVD rubs his temple and mutters, "Why'd I take my eye mask off today?" He turns to Helen: "It belonged to her late aunt." He points to Joan. Helen turns around. Joan's shoulders sink before she turns to face her mother. Helen: "Oh, God." Joan says it's not how it looks. It's not? I'd say it pretty much is. Joan admits to selling the clothes. Judith: "But we sunk all the money back into buying clothes for the homeless." Man, Judith just has no compunction. Joan says they bought five times as many clothes. Helen: "And you didn't keep anything for yourselves?" Judith shakes her head innocently. She doesn't even have a passing acquaintance with the truth, that girl. Joan, typically, equivocates: "Well…not much, anyway…" Helen's really pissed: "What did you take?" Joan: "Nothing!" Helen glares. Joan: "Almost nothing. I mean, we were supposed to take something for incentive, you know, like Adam Smith said." Man, Helen is madder than I've ever seen her: "Oh, shut the hell up about Adam Smith!" PMVD: "I really wouldn't cross her." Helen asks where the money is. Joan says it's "sorta gone." Helen: "Sort of." Joan confesses about the belly rings. Yeah, Helen's real impressed with that. Joan adds, "We got a laptop…for Adam." She quickly adds, "Rove," so her mother doesn't go off again about Adam Smith. Judith contributes that they got a really good deal on it. Joan swears they didn't hurt anybody. Helen says people have stopped donating clothes. Jeez, that was fast. She continues, "They trusted us! That man gave us his dead wife's coat for the homeless, not for you! And not for belly rings!" Man, sometimes italics are just so…inadequate. Helen sighs. She doesn't know what else to say, and she rushes out. Joan's eyes are filled with tears. Even Judith manages to look mildly chastised. I can't be arsed to find an ounce of sympathy for them.

Joan of Arcadia

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