Joe Millionaire
Diamond Ring

Episode Report Card
Kim: C+ | Grade It Now!
Diamond Ring

Evan settles in and says that there are two things he needs to get off his chest. Number one is I hate you and number two is you suck! That would have been awesome. But, as if he's going to be that direct. He begins by expressing his feelings for the times they've spent together: "They've been really, really neat." Okay, right when she heard the word "neat," Sarah had to know she didn't get picked. Because "neat" is the word you use to describe a night at your grandma's house playing cards or something. Evan brings up the tango dancing and the grape-picking, and says he felt a connection with Sarah early on. He appreciates her company, and he can't think of a time that they didn't enjoy each other's company, because it's all been wonderful. He says, "So what I'm going to say right now might come as a shock. I did not inherit $50 million dollars." Sarah's eyebrows shoot up and then she nods. So, you know, she can claim in all those interviews she's done that she knew all along because Evan kept screwing up, but she looked genuinely surprised when he said that, and then regained her composure. Also, interesting choice to have him tell her about the money first. I'm guessing the producers were hoping she would run out or do something to reveal that she was just in it for the money all along. Evan explains that he's a heavy equipment operator. Sarah has a tight grin on her face that looks really fake. Evan says that it wasn't difficult for him to hang out with the girls, but it was difficult for him to keep the story up.

Sarah asks if he thought she was concerned with the money. I refuse to believe that Evan just didn't answer that question, but I agree with editorial choice to cut his response, because it's hilarious that her question just hangs in the air as Evan thinks it over and then blurts, "I haven't chosen you." Sarah purses her lips like, "That bitch, Zora! She must have screwed him! And here I thought she was all innocent." Evan struggles for something else to say and concludes, "I just had a really good time." Sarah finally lets him off the hook by saying that it was an adventure. They hug and Evan says, "See you later." No, he won't! That's like when you're paying a toll on the highway and the toll collector is like, "Drive safe!" and you automatically go, "You too!" and then you drive down the highway like Chris Farley going, "I'm such an idiot!" Or maybe that's just me. Sarah looks sad as Evan walks out. You know the producers were watching the footage hoping she would cry or storm out or something. In an interview, Evan says he felt that Sarah was into Joe Millionaire and not Evan Marriott. As opposed to Zora, who knows the real Evan so deeply, given the total of ten hours they have spent together in front of cameras.

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Joe Millionaire




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