Joe Millionaire
Emerald Necklace, Again

Episode Report Card
Kim: D+ | Grade It Now!
Emerald Necklace, Again

The women all thank David for the afternoon. Yeah, thanks for making us shovel shit, asshole. Linda interviews that after they finished riding, they went down the hill to "a little tent area." Petra interviews that David showed them the camping site, where they could camp under the stars. David shows them how the outdoor shower works. Anique interviews that the tents seemed pretty comfortable. Lina says that Linda asked if there was an air conditioner. Given the heat wave in Europe this summer, I don't think that was such a crazy question. Paul is standing around in a safari outfit, like, "Livingston, I presume?" I don't like Paul in a different outfit. It's bad. David announces that they have a cooler full of beer, and the women are way more excited about that than they have been about anything else in this episode so far. They rush the cooler with a cheer. David voice-overs that he's finally going to spend the whole night with these girls. I'm sure something will happen. If by "something," you mean, "my falling asleep."

Wow, that show Skin looks really good. I'm sure it will be a blockbuster in the ratings.

A chef grills up some steaks (which look really fatty) and corn on the cob. The women dance around. Olinda interviews that David invited them to "a real proper American barbecue." I guess. I'm sure it's a regional thing, but when I think of barbecue, I think of smoked meat, like pork or beef, served with barbecue sauce. Steaks or burgers are a picnic, or just grilling. I hope none of the women is a vegetarian. There's a band consisting of an acoustic guitar player, and electric guitar player, and a fiddler. David interviews that it was great to show the women the food and music with which he grew up. Linda interviews, "There was a band playing music. David seemed to like it." Hee! The unspoken item being that she thought the music sucked. David talks to Linda and asks what she thinks about camping. Linda says she used to go camping with her parents when she was a kid, and that camping is very popular in the Czech Republic. Giada interviews that David is paying attention to Linda. David and Linda laugh together while the other women just stand around and stare at each other.

The eating begins. Petra interviews that David made amazing barbecue. Well, David didn't actually make it. David interviews that Anique sat by him and talked about the previous night's elimination. David reminds us that when he gave Anique the necklace, she was rude, but at the barbecue, she apologized for not thanking him. Boy, I wish that had been caught on camera. How did they miss that? David tells Anique that he just figured she was in a bad mood. Anique says she's usually friendlier, and then jokes that she's really unfriendly. At least, I think she's joking. Olinda says that the Dutch are always friendly. Anique interviews that now David has seen both sides of her, just like she's seen both sides of him. People have layers. Got it.

Olinda interviews that, after lunch, David suggested that they go down to the pool. I sure hope they waited thirty minutes before swimming! I wouldn't want anyone to get a cramp. Luckily, the women all packed their bikinis. David carries a cooler over to the pool, shirtless. I'm sure the producers were like, "David, it's a pool party! Take your shirt off. Oh, and can you go get that cooler for us? Just carry it over here. No, maybe you should put it over there. Wait, how about over here. Can you walk a little slower? Lift the cooler up a little. Thaaaaaat's it." Giada interviews that David has very big muscles, and that she didn't know that before. Olinda tells David that she can see his butt. Olinda is a little obsessed with butts. Cat interviews that it's always nice to see a guy half-naked. Well, it depends on the guy. Olinda voice-overs that David has a great body and is very athletic. Anique interviews that Olinda wanted to see David's body. Kristyna say that Olinda is nasty. David gets into the pool, and Olinda mauls him. Olinda voice-overs that she was trying to pull off his swimming trunks and "fool around for a bit in the pool." Well, at least she's honest. Olinda asks the other girls if they are "pissed off" because she's touching David. Giada laughs and says she is. Cat sits by herself on the side of the pool. Anique gets out of the pool and they try to make it out like she's stomping off in a huff, but maybe she was just tired of swimming.

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Joe Millionaire




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