Joe Millionaire
Filler Necklace

Episode Report Card
Kim: F | Grade It Now!
Filler Necklace

That night, the women eat dinner together. Sarah is still making her moaning and groaning noises. Zora brings up the subject of what will happen next. Sarah says she thinks Evan knows whom he's going to pick at this point. Zora doesn't know, but she thinks Evan might base his pick on geography and pick Sarah because she lives closer. Well, that was kind of a shitty thing to say. Like, "I'm pretty much superior, but you live ten miles away, so he'll go with you." Sarah says that if Evan's not all that into either of them, he might pick the one who lives furthest away so that no relationship can happen. The editors try to make it out like Zora and Sarah are sitting there in uncomfortable silence, but Zora is clearly talking. You just can't see her mouth. And I think every time they showed a close-up of one girl looking awkward, it was when the other one was talking. Sarah says she has to figure out something else to wear.

Sarah goes outside for a lonely smoke. In an interview, Zora says she probably wouldn't have been friends with Sarah outside of this, but that doesn't mean she wants to tear her apart. Zora takes her dirty dishes to the kitchen, because she's a good girl, and Sarah lights up, because she's a bad girl. Wow, Zora is so bow-legged. How come I never noticed all of her problems before?

Mastercheese Theatre. Paul says that Evan will break a heart. He's certainly broken my will to live. The bumper promises that after the commercials, the moment has arrived. Really? Finally!

Eight million shots of the chateau. Evan stands on the steps, drinking coffee. In an interview, Evan says that he spent his last moments with each woman, and now it's time to make his decision. Okay, the earlier intra-episode flashbacks were bad enough, but now they're flashing back to stuff they just showed before the commercial? This is pathetic. Evan says, "It's going to be a difficult decision." And here, all this time, I thought he was breezing right through it. Evan says he likes Zora a lot, because she's sweet and genuine, and he likes Sarah a lot, because she's dirty. Actually, he said she's funny and rebellious. Paul comments that Evan's decision has been made even more difficult. Is that even possible? In an interview, Evan says he's "neck-deep in it now." Neck-deep in what? Flashbacks? That's my guess.

Oh, my God! It's Sarah's dreaded eyebrow pencil! Someone confiscate it! Zora does yoga. Evan voice-overs for the third fucking time this episode that someone is going to get hurt. Evan drinks coffee. Paul stares into space. Zora paints her nails. Sarah looks out the window. Evan walks down the path. In an interview, Sarah says that she thinks Evan is under a lot of stress. But what I want to know is if his decision will be difficult. Zora repeats what she said at the top of the episode about this being a stressful situation, and how Evan must be overwhelmed. In an interview, Evan says that it will be difficult to tell the women the truth, and even if they forgive his lies, he's still a construction worker when it's over, so he has nothing to offer them.

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Joe Millionaire




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