Karen Sisco
Karen Sisco

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | 703 USERS: B-
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Nobody's Perfect

Karen, wearing a Pucci-inspired jacket, shows a photo of Louis to the hardware-store owner. The owner doesn't remember Louis. Karen gives him the credit-card information, and asks if he can look up what Louis bought. The guy checks his computer and says that Louis bought a "top of the line" hedge trimmer. The guy asks Karen how her hedges are doing. Hee! Did he really think that was going to work? Karen says that she lives in an apartment, and thus has no hedges (although I don't think Karen and the owner are talking about the same bush), and asks the guy to pull his security tapes for the time when the transaction took place. The guy agrees to do it, and suggests that Karen put a window box in her apartment to grow some tomatoes. Give it up, hardware-store guy. It's not going to happen. Also, you lost me with the tomatoes.

Karen walks out of the hardware store with the tapes just as a car pulls up to the curb. The two guys inside are discussing Louis as well; we learn that Louis is "number one on Mr. G's list," and that he used "the company credit card, in a hardware store no less." I'm just going to call these guys Pink and Brown, because that is the color of their shirts. And they must be gay, because Pink just picked lint off Brown's shirt collar. Come on. Pink tells Brown that while they are in the hardware store, he wants to get a new soap dish for the shower, and they argue about the color of their shower tiles. See? Straight guys never care about the color of their shower tiles. Straight guys probably couldn't tell you the color of their shower tiles, and usually that color is "soap scum white."

Karen pays a visit to Mrs. DiNardo, who claims she doesn't know where her husband is, and that she doesn't want Karen to come in. Karen says that she can come back with a bunch of Marshals and make a big fuss, and the neighbors will see. Mrs. DiNardo reluctantly lets Karen inside.

Karen shows Mrs. DiNardo a photo taken from the hardware-store surveillance tape. Mrs. DiNardo is sure that it's not Louis, as she drains a glass of wine. Karen asks if she knows the guy in the photo, and she says that she doesn't. Karen asks if Mrs. DiNardo has had any strange incidents in the last six months that might indicate that Louis was trying to make contact, like flowers or cards or phone hang-ups. Mrs. DiNardo guesses that Louis is back in Miami, but says that even when they were married, he was never home. She angrily adds that it's a shock to find out that "your mild-mannered accountant husband has shot a person and stolen three hundred thousand dollars." Karen asks if any of Louis's friends stopped by or called. Mrs. DiNardo chops the hell out of some squash (shades of Martha Stewart and the infamous cabbage on that CBS morning show) as she says that Louis wasn't the friendly type. Karen asks about girlfriends; Mrs. DiNardo gives her the stink-eye, and then says she's sure there was someone, but that she doesn't know any names. Mrs. DiNardo tells Karen that she's smart not to get married, because "sooner or later they all screw around on you." Bitter, party of one! Karen asks if Louis liked gardening, and Mrs. DiNardo says that he wouldn't even mow the lawn when they were married. Karen hands over her card and asks Mrs. DiNardo to call if she hears anything. Mrs. DiNardo pours herself another glass of wine and says that she considers her husband to be dead.

Karen Sisco

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