Fall Pilot Season: Kath & Kim
Kim calls the waiter over and asks him to send over some dumplings to the cute guy at the next table, who is clearly on a date. Kath asks what she thinks she's doing, and Kim explains that she's back on the market. Kath informs her that he appears to be with someone, to which Kim replies, "So what? I'm married."
Phil, resigned, throws up his hands and says that this is as good a time as any, and gets down on one knee to propose to Kath. "Kathay," he begins, "There's something I'd like to... propose to you." He's interrupted by the waiter, who comes to inform Kim that the woman whose date she sent the dumplings to is going to cut her throat if she doesn't back off. Indignant, Kim says that this is the reason she quit high school. "Because of jealous BITCHES like that," and jumps out of her seat, affecting a pose that appears to be a threat to the woman at the table. Kath tells her to sit down and zip her lip, and Kim goes back to sulking, saying "Thanks for ruining my night now."
Back at the homestead the next day, Kim is at her laptop in the kitchen and Kath breezes in in a leopard-print nightie. Barely looking up, Kim asks if she heard that cat wailing last night. Kath says no, and Phil strides in wearing a short bathrobe with the same print as Kath's nightgown, asking if this "tired soldier" can get a cup of joe. Kim jumps up, grossed out when she realizes that those noises weren't the cat. Kath's like, "That's right -- we had a night of passion, and I'm not gonna be ashamed about it." Kim says she's going to be sick and Kath counters that maybe she wouldn't have to feel sick if she went back to Craig. Phil says he needs to hit the Island, and Kath asks if they're still on for sushi. Kim inserts herself into the conversation, saying "Sushi sounds good!" Kath gives her a withering look, which she doesn't seem at all aware of.
Later on, Craig's planted in front of the TV watching that blasted wedding video in what appears to be his apartment, sprawled on a black leather sectional. Kath bursts in and announces that he must get Kim to move back in. She explains that her budding romance is being ruined by Kim's constant presence. Kath levels with Craig and says that if he really loves Kim and wants her back, he's going to have to accept who she is and give up everything, like she's been doing for 27 years. Craig whines that he thought marriage was about having a best friend and a companion to go through life with. Kath pauses from cleaning up the coffee table strewn with pizza boxes to say, "Well then, maybe you should've married a dog." True dat, sistah! Or something. I dunno, I'm not married but it sounds like sound advice.