MONDO EXTRAS

Simon Doonan comes out. He's also shorter than the mic. You'd think they'd fix that. Doonan makes an Edith Piaf reference. No one in the audience laughs. Clearly the reality show crowd isn't a big fan of La Vie En Rose. Chrysler, the car company, presents the Design Innovation Award to the Wii Fit. I can't handle his speech about fat asses because I'd actually rather be playing with my Wii Fit than watching this. Some pro skateboarder dude, who is not Tony Hawk, Wee-Man or Rob Drydek and therefore out of my scope of knowledge on the subject, comes out to accept the award. He looks like he's going to fall off his board. Are we sure this guy is for real and not just some goober who came in for the open bar and free trophy? He talked for a really long time, but those Magical Elves producers found a way to edit it way, way down. Genius. And they left in him almost falling on his ass. Best part of the whole night so far.

It is at this point that I realize that one of Kathy's best rants has not been included in the program. She pretty much took out the list of words that she was given and told not to say and rattled it off verbatim and included info on what part of asshole would be bleeped out by the censors and such. It is too bad, that it didn't make the cut, but with the edit it probably would have just been a string of beeps and not as funny as it was live. Sorry.

Make it work time. Tim Gunn's back giving the designers some advice. I miss Project Runway. And I'm really glad to see something that I didn't already sit through. Chris March horrifies Tim Gunn with the human hair. Tim says it is Cousin It. Could he be any cuter?

Molly Sims gives away the "A-List Actor Male" trophy. Oh, oh. I'm so excited. This is the best acceptance speech! It is pre-taped because Mad Men dreamboat Jon Hamm couldn't be there in person because he's probably hard at work smoking and drinking or something. Jon's so proud to win a Gay List Award and shows off his partner/co-star John Slattery. They then realize that it is A-List. Whoops. Slattery says to "just be grateful that America gave you a little ..." and then a smiling Hamm happily finishes that sentence with "head." Seriously. I want to hang out with these guys and be sexually harassed about not showing off my legs and ankles. I know it is wrong, but they are amazing. If you haven't seen this show... why are you reading this. Go download it off iTunes immediately. This Extra ain't going anywhere. You can read it when you are done.