Kathy meets with Samantha, the totally scary (yet totally awesome) wedding planner. Kathy interviews that she loves it when she comes across someone mean, bitchier, and bossier than herself. Indeed, Samantha appears to be a somewhat perfect combo of imperious and good-humored. She reminds Kathy that "titties" is the one verboten word, then totally makes fun of Kathy's green dress for a hundred years. It's fantastic.
Kathy meets with the "press" who came to cover the event... which equates to one British reporter from the Daily News. Kathy drops some provocative quotes about wanting to be called a "high priestess" now, and referring to the Lord as a "she." With no other reporters to talk to, Kathy makes her way to the aisle. She milks the applause as she walks down, then drops an f-bomb three seconds in and asks where her gays are at. Fortunately, this appears to be a cool(ish) crowd, so she gets some laughs.
It's interesting, because besides the fact that they're in a barn and Kathy Griffin is saying "shit" on the altar, it's a fairly traditional wedding, with the dress and the organ and "Here Comes the Bride" and all. Kathy explains to the guests about how she's been cleared to say any fucking thing she wants... except the word "titties." Which is when the "titties" counter shows up in the corner of the screen. Ahhh, saw that coming. Kathy interviews that if they hadn't forbade her from saying it, she probably wouldn't have, but now they're in for "the tittiest wedding ever."
Kathy lays out the choices between a "traditional," "simple," and "jailhouse" ceremony. Jailhouse wins, and Kathy starts reading the appropriate text. Of course, that's only a guideline for Kathy, and Samantha, hidden behind a white curtain, literally keeps poking at Kathy to keep her on task. It's not like she doesn't have cause, given that Kathy pronounces them man and wife before they even get to the vows. Ooops! They eventually get it right, and Tiffany raises her hand to object like Kathy told her too, and Samantha has to remind them to do the glass-breaking thing, and Kathy interviews that she wanted to take a pen and jab it back at that white curtain until she hit Samantha in the pussy. And so now they're married!
With that taken care of, we head back to Manhattan, where Kathy meets up with her pals Molly Shannon and Megan Mullally. Megan expresses her condolences about Kathy's dad, which Kathy says is now her No. 1 "airport question," as in what fans will ask her if they run into her, say at an airport. Molly's is "Are you the lady who does 'Superstar'?" and Megan's used to be a request to do the "Karen" voice, but now they just mistake her for Tina Fey. Which I can actually see. Megan then tells a funny story about tongue-kissing Rob Lowe in About Last Night, and then Molly -- who is totally the Whitney Port of this scene -- asks leading questions about the MSG show. Then Kathy transitions into more talk about The View, and Megan advises her to "fuck The View" and do her own show. Hmmm, a little residual morning-show rivalry there from Megan? Whatever, she's delightful.