Knight Rider

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: D | Grade It Now!
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Another Clever "Poisoning" Pun
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Night. KITT wants to know if Michael is awake, because a new mission is coming in. You know, they have that cool hangar with a basketball court and everything. I don't know why they always have to get their orders while they're out on the road like this. Michael claims to be awake, although KITT's biometric fooforaw blahblah sensors indicate he's still fatigued from the last mission. You mean the one on the beach in Mexico? With all the tequila and bikinis? That didn't look that fatiguing to me.

Michael gets out and puts his cellphone on KITT's hood, which lights up and starts showing all sorts of random information. KITT offers to just display everything inside like normal, but Michael claims that he likes being outside. Michael checks out the mission while KITT reminds him about something we don't know about that A) has to be done tonight, and B) will upset Sarah if it isn't. KITT claims to have "confirmed the item's location", and it looks like we're in another one of those episodes where everyone talks vaguely about "the item" and "the target" instead of actually saying what they're talking about. It's like these scripts got about 70% finished, but had to be run into production before anyone had time to put in the details. In this case, the "item" appears to be a silver briefcase.

Back at HQ, Carrie (that's the FBI agent that Sydney Poitier plays; you might have forgotten she exists since she's been gone since the pilot) is watching the same footage as Michael and confirms that it's the right thing. Billy and Zoe are trying to have a conversation about whatever's happening tonight, but Alex is being a Mean Boss and cutting them off in midsentence. That means there's a lot of "But isn't tonight --" and "She's gonna be --" going on, because it's suspenseful to have characters talking about things when the audience doesn't know what's going on. Wait, did I say "suspenseful"? I may have meant "a cheap effect to imitate suspense without any actual suspense at all." I get those confused sometimes, which explains why that film society never invited me back after my speech where I called Hitchcock "Indisputably the Master of Cheap Effects to Imitate Suspense Without any Actual Suspense at All."

Anyway, Alex is much more interested in the mission, which involves grabbing this guy with the briefcase. He's apparently an expert smuggler, and this is their chance to grab him. We see him walking through a fairly pleasant outdoor cafe area, and it occurs to me that they're using a knee-high tracking shot. And I think that was the video feed KITT had, which means he was hacking into some kind of hubcap-cam. The smuggler sets the briefcase down next to a Gourmet Sausage Sandwich stand (because the Hot Dog people wouldn't pony up for product placement?) and a guy in a cream-colored suit says into his wrist that the item is down and the woman he's with goes after the courier. HQ doesn't know who these people are, so KITT taps into a radio frequency (you know, any random radio frequency will do). Zoe bets Billy five dollars that the mission is screwed, which seems inappropriate. Do you really want someone on your team who's got money riding on failure? Sure, it's only five bucks today, but that's still incentive for her to "accidentally" lose contact with KITT or something. Incidentally, I have no idea where KITT or Mike are. They're just offscreen somewhere being notified that things aren't going right. What, like they can't check the ratings themselves?

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Knight Rider

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