Las Vegas
Decks and Violence

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Sobell: D+ | Grade It Now!
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Swizzle shtick

Danny goes down and does it, and as he exits the car, he's promptly shot in the leg by the same dim hired gun who apparently confused "Rebecca Gayheart and her big curly hair in a hat" with "Luke Perry and his receding hairline." Danny's understandably yowling in pain. We get Deus Ed Machina #2 with Big Ed appearing out of nowhere to beat the crap out Louie until Danny yells for him to stop, since it's looking like Big Ed's going to beat him to death. These two go through that drill a lot, with Big Ed getting all kill-happy while Danny screams for him to knock it off. Big Ed calms down as he hears Danny on the phone saying calmly, "Yeah, I need some officers down at the Montecito dock. There's been a shooting. [pause] No, I'm the victim!" You know, with that delivery, he sounded an awful lot like Ben (sigh) Browder. And here you all were thinking, fifty-four minutes into the episode, that you were going to get out of this recap without one mention of that man.

After a pointless shot of the Strip at night merging into a pointless shot of the Strip during the day, we see Danny in a hospital bed. Big Ed comes in to see him and asks, "So you do, ah, know that when I took over operations, I dealt with rising insurance premiums by upping your deductible to $1000 and switching insurance carriers, so you're on the Gettysburg health plan. That means you'll be, um, biting down on this hickory stick while the surgeons dig the bullet out of your leg without anesthesia." Oh, he does not. Instead, he's all, "So how's it feel to be me?" Heh. We find out Danny will be in a cast for the next few months, which works out well since Josh Duhamel will be limping for about that long too, and it's all good. Big Ed tells him half-seriously, "I was thinking, instead of it being one guy, why don't we tell everyone you took a bullet protecting me from eight or nine guys with crowbars." Aww, male bonding. And then, because it's an episode of Las Vegas, it ends with everyone throwing an impromptu party in the room. Everyone clowns around, and Danny grins like getting shot in the leg is almost as much fun as standing around at a mass wedding, a wake, or a Wayne Newton impersonator concert.

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Las Vegas

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