Las Vegas
Luck Be A Lady

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B- | Grade It Now!
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Bigamist Ed

Mimi's oblivious to this. She's pulled out a cell phone -- is there nothing she can't cram into that purse? -- and is punching buttons. Big Ed, meanwhile, is throwing Danny to the ground and swinging a leg on top of him to subdue him. One of Mimi's minions is pulling her out of Danny's direct path. A few of the Montecito security swabbies -- they are dressed like deckhands, you know -- come out. Big Ed asks Danny what's wrong with him. Shouldn't this be where Delinda or Mary comes on out and begins reciting a list? Anyway, Danny gasps, "She's got a gun." Big Ed follows his line of sight, then grins and rises, using Danny's prostate body to push himself off the ground. "Hey! Sandy!" he greets her. She gets up all, "Ed!" and saunters on over. Still on the ground, Danny gasps, "You know her?" Mimi/Sandy tells him matter-of-factly, "I'm his wife." Danny lets his head fall back on the carpet, and Big Ed's grin diminishes a little.

Elvis kicks in right then, telling everyone to shut their mouths.

Commercial time! A bunch of pretty people shot on black-and-white stock tell me they're going to judge me by my watch, but since they favor Seiko watches, I doubt their opinions are worth a rat's ass. Also, apparently The West Wing's government shutdown took all the lights with it, but I'm sure Deborah's covered that in more detail.

When we come back, Sheryl Lee Ralph strides on into the casino from stage left sporting a yappy little dog and a disbelieving expression. Enter Mary and Sam from stage right; Sam is practically giggling as she says, "So I've heard nothing but good things about Janet Ellis." Mary says, "Shut up," and Sam tells her to smile pretty. Mary unleashes one of her thousand-watt grins and strides on over to meet Janet Ellis. Before she finishes introducing herself, Janet says, "Quickly, darling! Kiki and I cannot take this desert heat." Mary quavers through a warm Montecito welcome, but Janet barrels on over her with, "Have you got any Evian? You know, the last time I was here, someone actually gave Kiki tap water." Mary says, "Really!" "Tap water!" Janet repeats for emphasis. It's a pity that we've already established that Janet's doing a one-time show before terrorizing the rest of the world; what this show really could use is an insane diva on the premises nonstop. I mean, an actual insane diva, as opposed to dilettante Delinda. However -- what the hell kind of diva name is Janet? Not that Janet isn't a fine name, but it lacks the glitz factor one associates with divas.

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Las Vegas

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