Las Vegas

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B- | Grade It Now!
Danny's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

No. Danny answers, "The civil war between the Dukes of Orleans and Burgundy allowed Henry to capture the port of Harfleur." He then VOs, "Although we play this military history game all the time, I think the implication here is that he's Henry and I'm the French -- right before the massacre." Oh, come on: after a specific reference to civil war and domestic vulnerability, that is what Danny comes up with? It's so totally clear that Big Ed thinks of Danny as Henry, come to take advantage of a house divided to conquer and marry the old king's daughter.

Big Ed just stands there and gives Danny a long look. Damn, but James Caan can do more in one look than many actors do in a year. We're saved from further discussion about Agincourt, Henry V's prowess, bands of brothers, or the dramatically inconvenient fact that Henry V actually took five years after the Battle of Agincourt to make an honest woman of Catherine of Valois. Thank God for cheating gamblers!

Said cheater is a schlubby-looking guy in a leather baseball cap who's sitting at a blackjack table, one hand on the felt. We go from a table-eye view to a security-camera-eye view of him. Then we slip up to the security room again. The unnamed security drone also points out a bum in bunny slippers heading to the cashier's cage; Bunny Slippers cashes a Social Security check for $426. We veer between the you-are-there view and the security view. Big Ed asks who's on the floor, and someone else answers, "The Ice Queen." Emma Frost? Cool.

Big Ed deals with that, then comes over to tell a gaping Danny, "You not only violated my trust in you, but the sanctity of my family." Man, if Danny doesn't pick up the parallels between himself and randy Prince Hal at this point, he's a lost cause. Danny protests, "Big Ed, if I had known she was your daughter --" Big Ed interrupts, "For your own welfare, do not finish that sentence. Your judgment is already suspect." Is it too early to declare my love for Big Ed? Danny apologizes some more, and Big Ed wrings him out like a washcloth with, "To say that I'm disappointed in you would be an understatement of epic proportions. Now, apart from the fact that she's my daughter, this is a question I'm asking you as executive vice president in charge of surveillance and security for a multibillion dollar corporation. Do you routinely jump into bed with women you do not know the background of? Because if you do, that is a major breach of security."

If Danny were smart, he'd realize that the only good answer to that is, "I'll clean out my desk." Fortunately for us, he's kind of dim. So he just answers, "No, sir. I do not [routinely jump into bed with mystery women]." Big Ed jumps on him with both feet: "So it's just with my daughter, then."

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Las Vegas




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