After a one-hour recap special re-running a compressed version of last week's two-hour premiere, we settle in for the next round of auditions, in Hell-A (do people other than Ted Casablancas call it that?) and Sydney, Australia.
Hollywood montage! Except this one is totally original, seriously. Hollywood sign! Walk of Fame! Palm trees! Uh, Grauman's Chinese theater...Hmmm, maybe we have seen this stuff before. A sign at the Improv says that the open casting call is at 10 AM. Most real comedians are going to bed at 10 AM. Bellamy is trying to get everybody excited to make some noise. Dude, it's 10 AM. Could we make noise after our third latte? Bellamy gives some high-fives and calls a guy wearing a suit "Spiffy." He picks out a cute young lady and calls her "Cutie." She says she moved to L.A. from New York. He asks how long she's been doing comedy. She hasn't before. Bellamy takes the dog out behind the shed, telling her she won't win. Surprise! People in the crowd are coerced into saying, "I am the Last Comic Standing." Can they add, "And they paid me $20 to say this?"
Inside the theater, Ant, Alonzo, and Kathleen give each other some pre-audition dap, sealing a pact to send forth not just the funny comics, but the ones who are represented by agents who are producers on the show. Wait, did I just type that out loud? Delete, delete, delete! Gerry Dee! Delete, delete, delete. First comic on the chopping block: Jon Reep, of Hickery, Sweet North Carolina. He makes a joke about smoking in L.A. (you can't) versus smoking in North Carolina (hells, yeah!). Kathleen likes it. Redneck humor. Kathleen tells him to save it for the show. Alonzo tells him to bring his caulking gun to the show. Ant's ears perk up until he realizes what he actually heard.
Alonzo wants to hear some good comics. Epileptic blur of comics. Maggie McCoy, Irishwoman from L.A., jokes about her crazy Irish mother. She's loud and screechy. Kathleen pity-chuckles. Ant is not into this. Alonzo passes. He talks about loving train wrecks.
Joseph Neibich, of Gilbert, Arizona. He tries some "I'm a racist, ha ha, jokes!" humor; Alonzo says he's not offended as a black guy, but that he's offended as a comic. That was funnier than the routine itself. Anthony Browning, of Long Beach. Weird guy. Not funny. Julius Mogyorossy, of L.A. Dirty Native American humor. Ant asks if he has any clean material. Nope! Gone! Lizzy Cooperman of Minneapolis sizes up the talent scouts. She's cute and awkward and very confident on stage despite her schtick. They all like her. She's in the big show.