Launch My Line

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C | Grade It Now!
Down in Flames

The fashion show is over and it's time for the results. DJ Eric is called out as safe for this round. UGH. He'll never be eliminated! He'll win this whole stupid show with his awful outdated clubwear! That leaves the other four in the "interesting" category. Merle's model walks out first. Lisa Kline says she likes it and thinks it would sell in her stores. "But let's be honest, Lisa Kline," Stefani begins. I love how Lisa Kline is so important that she must be referred to by her first and last name at all times. Stefani continues that the convertible aspect of the dress might be too complicated for customers, because apparently only dumbasses buy clothes in Stefani's world. Merle says they'll include instructions with the dress. "It doesn't even have to have any writing, just pictures," she says. Obviously, Merle has never had to deal with IKEA assembly instructions, which also have no writing and just pictures and can be harder to decipher than hieroglyphics without a Rosetta Stone. Despite Stefani's complaints, I think Merle is safe this week.

The Dandy is up next. Stefani says she's not sure if the dress is "red hot sexy" or if it belongs in the Red Light District. I went to the Red Light District in Amsterdam once. Obviously, Stefani has never actually been to the Red Light District. DSquared2 agree with me that they don't like the tights. Lisa Kline thinks they went overboard with the distressing, to the point that the dress just looks damaged. DSquared2 pick up on the fact that Roberto basically chopped the front off and say the front combined with the bustle and train in the back make it look unbalanced, although they do like the fabric Dandy used as well as the design of the back of the dress.

Louanna is up next. She says they used a rose color for the top because their inspiration was Kathy Rose. "Clever," Stefani claims. Yes, it is clever. If you live in Stefani's world of dumbasses who don't know how to work a dress. Also if you don't know that Louanna picked that rose fabric well before she knew she had to use Kathy has her inspiration. Stefani praises Jim's jeans, saying he used many difficult techniques in a very short amount of time. Seriously - those jeans look really good. DSquared2 knock Louanna's outfit for being more "reality" than "runway." Jim speaks up to take the blame for that, saying they didn't have enough time to make the top really special because the jeans took too long. Lisa Kline ignores him and says she would have liked to see them do a little more with the shirt. Stefani agrees, saying her typical dumbass customer has the attention span of gnat, so you have wow her immediately or lose the sale. Kathy's dress is the last to come out. Kathy explains her distressing technique and how it made their cheap fabric look expensive and nice. The judges all agree with her on that. Lisa Kline says she loves the "sexy" back of Kathy's dress, so suck on that, Puritan Merle! She thinks it would sell, but DSquared2 say the placement of the belt is a bit too low and they don't like the feather.

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Launch My Line




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