Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

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Daniel: D+ | 9 USERS: C+
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Why sure! The creator of the game itself can't see, despite all the other fancy programs he has, just where on the lake this cabin is. Not without making the sun rise (it's currently night time in the game) and "freaking out" all the users. Wynton, despite uncomplainingly handing out his customers' private information, balks at this, but eventually does it, and Fin and Chester find Cooper's cabin, which is being guarded by a shotgun-wielding woman, who wants to know if they brought Gregory Searle with them. "I've been waiting for him, for twenty-five years," she says. This is Lauren, and she must be hungry.

Not happy that this spells defeat for their plan, Elliot arrests Cooper at La Guardia anyway -- for jaywalking. He'll be getting his own spinoff next fall: Crosswalk Violations Unit.

Back at the precinct, Lauren confirms everything Cooper said: she loved him, he rescued her from her "bastard father and his drunk bitch of a wife." She got a job waiting tables and spent the next quarter-century waiting for this guy. She still loves him (and she's even seen him just now, so the paunchiness and the thinning white hair are apparently not a problem). She doesn't believe what Olivia and Elliot tell her about the McGarrett kidnapping and death.

And the reunion's not quite what Lauren hoped for; when she walks in the room, she smiles, but the expression on his face is more along the lines of "My God...I never should have buried my son in the Pet Sematary." She hugs him, tears in her eyes. "It's me," she says. "I know who you are," he says coldly. "Don't you still love me?" she asks. "What happened to you? You got so old," he says. And just like that, he erases twenty-five years of love. "You're sick," says Lauren, and then accuses him of kidnapping Rachel and killing her, and she slaps him, and he admits it. And now he'll be going to jail, because he couldn't just say to Lauren, "Hey, you look great!" and have done with it.

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Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

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