A doctor tells a young patient he has to admit he has gonorrhea, not a cold. Boy, that takes me back. The kid's reluctant, but the doctor says he needs to tell the girl he slept with. "It wasn't a girl. It was a woman," says the kid.

Cut to Melissa Joan Hart as Sarah Trent, teaching an English class. Benson and Stabler show up, escort her into the hall, and arrest her for statutory rape. Is that what Shane told you? She asks. Stabler says it was the pediatrician who told him, after Shane told the doctor that Sarah seduced him. Nuh-uh, says Sarah. "Shane raped me," she says.

We do the annoying overlapping dialogue thing, with Fin and Chester interviewing Shane, and Elliot and Olivia interviewing Sarah. She was tutoring Shane when he raped her, according to her, whereas he's sticking to his story that she seduced him (seeming ashamed to have gotten excited). It's he-said, she-said right now, which seems enough for Shane's parents to assume the police are going to throw her in the slammer. She says she didn't say anything about the rape when it happened (two months ago) because she didn't want her husband to know. As for the gonorrhea, she says she's never had it, so the detectives toss her apartment to find any medications one would take to clear it up, which they do, along with some unidentified stuff in ampoules. Sarah's firefighter husband shows up, surprised to see cops in his apartment. He just got off a 48-hour tour; he didn't talk to his wife last night and doesn't know where she is. Try Chuck E. Cheese's! The detectives tell the husband about the rape charges, which he doesn't believe, and says the medicine they found is for a urinary tract infection. He calls his wife's cellphone, worried she might hurt herself (he says she used to cut herself) and there's no answer, but the phone rang several times, which means it's operating, so the detectives can track it.

Which they do, to an office building, thanks to some other cops with fancy technology. They even have a little gun that'll pinpoint the signal of her cellphone to within five feet. Fin and Chester bust in on a family planning clinic, which, much to the detectives' consternation, won't let them bust in on her while she's having surgery. Thanks a lot, constitutional protections!

Olivia and Casey dash through many hallways in a drawn-out emergency warrant-obtaining procedure from Judge Brady. He wants to know why they need the "products of conception" since both parties concede sex took place. Casey says the fetus is the only proof of the rape. How does that work, exactly? Can you tell that a fetus has been conceived against the mother's will? I call shenanigans.