Opening credit montage. Behold the perps, the hookers, the child abductors: they who continually vex the Lawful and Orderly Universe. Look upon them! Alas.
Yo, Lexus, maybe this is NOT the best time to run a commercial for your SUV.
At the station, Cap'n Cragen tells the squad that Teresa Burgess is sixteen years old and a model. Munch flips through Teresa's portfolio while Stabler tells everyone about the case: now the victim's in a coma, and she had prescription amphetamines in her little backpack. Jeffries thinks the attacker is someone who knew the victim. "Sure it is," Munch snaps at her, "and now if you can give us his name and address we can all go home early." Jeffries gives him an annoyed look that says, "Dude, I don't get the addresses of perps, I just pick them up in bars and take them home with me." Well, at this point in the season we don't actually know that her look says that, but, well, you know. Benson speculates it could be "one-way familiarity some loser fantasizes he had a relationship with her." Cassidy points out that Teresa's picture is everywhere. "Tell me about it," says Munch. "I spent my lunch hour the other day gazing across the street at her, three stories high, on a billboard for conditioning rinse. Felt like I had a relationship with her." And then on his coffee break he had an imaginary divorce from her. Aw, Munch.
According to Teresa's datebook, her last appointment that day was for a photo shoot. "Where's the family on this?" asks Cragen. Stabler says the mother lives upstate; the father was home in bed at the time. "While his sixteen-year-old daughter was out roaming the streets at three in the morning?" says Cragen. He tells Stabler and Benson to interview the father and orders everyone else to "take statements from the models" (i.e. "I am soooo full after eating that spring roll," "I am totally into animal rights," and "Simon LeBon's dick is really not as big as everyone says"). As everyone goes off on their assignments, Jeffries mentions that she's appearing in court. It's just a little sub-plot. Don't worry about it.













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