Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Episode Report Card
1075 USERS: C+
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Stocks & Bondage

So we're chung-chung-ing again, this time to the Barbizon hotel, where Mr. Tucker the auditor is shaving and telling Stabler, in his very thick Tennessee accent, that "Martin Global Fund had a controlling interest in the Tennessee Valley Teachers Retirement Fund. The third quarter showed irregularities and I was sent to perform an audit." Anyway, the financial blather boils down to the fact that Martin Global made a bunch of funky investments that were aggressive, but never illegal. Tucker checked into the assets, and they were right on the line. If Martin Global defaulted, Tennessee would be screwed. "The obligation is large enough that I've been looking for a legal reason for the state to take it over." Benson informs Tucker that Martin is missing, and wonders if anything in his investigation might help locate him. Tucker shakes his head and proclaims Frank Martin to be a weasel. He's been in New York for five months and still can't find anything to pin on Martin. Benson's cell phone rings, and as she ducks out to take the call, Stabler asks Tucker if he came across any associates of Martin who might be sheltering him. Tucker says that "everything he does is just barely legitimate. If I give you one address, I'll have to give you fifty." Stabler goes for the fifty, and Tucker hands him a file before saying, "I've been trying to nail down Martin for five months. You catch him, you give me a few minutes with him." Stabler and Benson leave the room, and Benson lets us all know that the call was from Munch. McKuin the slimy diamond dealer got a call from a woman who wants to sell a large quantity of diamonds. Stabler's philosophical about his suspect: "If there's anything Martin's got going for him, it's women to do his bidding." Word.

Next we see a finger ringing a security buzzer, which lets Sho-Ling Fu enter the room where we met David McKuin. She asks where McKuin is, and an accented voice asks who she is. She introduces herself and demands that her question be answered. Munch and his fake accent tell her that he sent McKuin on an errand. "McKuin runs errands?" "He does what I tell him. Most people in the industry do." Sho-Ling is not so quick on the uptake, so she asks, "What industry?" Cassidy's cute face appears onscreen as he condescends to her, "You've never heard of John deMunch?" She covers pretty quickly: "You're John deMunch," like she's known of him since she was in utero. "Let me put it this way," says deMunch. "I could make a call to Johannesburg and release so many diamonds onto the market that whatever it is you're carrying wouldn't be worth the price of a pack of gum." Sho-Ling wonders how she knows she can trust him. Duh, he's John deMunch! "I'm a businessman," he replies. "I don't think anyone has ever trusted me. Your move." I am none to pleased to admit that a Munch-centric scene amused me. But I'll be the bigger person and own that.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

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