Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Stocks & Bondage

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Stocks & Bondage

Out in the squad room, Munch shows the daybook to Benson and Stabler, but he wants to beg off picking up Kelp because he has an appointment with his phrenologist. He then likens phrenology to "feng shui for the head." No one wants him to miss that. Stabler and Benson grab their jackets and head out to get Kelp. Stabler's putting the pieces together: "Martin's employees are pawns. Adding Kelp gives the shady diamond purchase legitimacy by helping the poor and downtrodden." He figures that Layla must have crossed everybody. Lemme just borrow a little from Arlo Guthrie here and say this: Remember Layla? This is a story about Layla.

Again with the non-chunging! Cellos escort us into the New Vision Endowment. Stabler and Benson go into Kelp's office where he's sitting silently in his big-ass leather chair, with his back to them. If you don't know what's coming next, you don't watch nearly enough TV. He doesn't answer them, so they turn the chair around and we see a dripping bullet hole in his forehead. Anyone for a jelly donut?

Back in the interrogation room, Sho-Ling Fu is telling Stabler and Benson that if they keep her there any longer, she'll sue. They tell her about Kelp's death, and she is genuinely shocked. She sobs, "He did it!" Benson asks if by "he" she means Frank Martin. Sho-Ling nods and gets bitchy like a good girl should: "Frank Martin never followed through on one thing in his entire life until now." Stabler clarifies that she's saying Martin killed David Kelp. She confirms that Martin threatened to kill her boyfriend if she ran or went to the police. Stabler wants more information. Sho-Ling tells them that four hours ago he came to her with a clear plastic bag full of diamonds and asked her to cash them out. Um, there's no way in hell the whole sting deal and all of this interrogation and finding of dead bodies happened in less than four hours. In New York City. I'm just saying. ["Word to that. It takes that long just to take a cab across town." -- Sars] Stabler is skeptical that Martin trusts Sho-Ling enough to have her cash out the diamonds. Sho-Ling scoffs at this. "He doesn't trust anyone. He knew David and I were close . . . he asked for a favor and in the same breath threatened someone's life. Classic Martin." Stabler says it sounds like she knows Martin pretty well. She busts out the sob story; goes well with the sobbing, I guess. "When I first met Frank I was dancing in a cage, with fluorescent green paint all over me. He liked me, even though my name was Angela Torres then. It was his idea to change it to Sho-Ling. That's what he gave me: an exotic ideal." Okay, I could go off for days here about how American men view Asian and Latin women, and how sick it makes me, but since I'm neither Asian nor Latin and not as well-informed on the socio-psychological aspects of the stereotypes to make an intelligent argument right now, I'll just say this: Fucking ew. Benson asks Sho-Ling/Angela to tell them where she was planning to meet up with Martin after cashing out the diamonds.

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Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

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