Jackie finishes soccer practice and tells someone that she's going over to Dino's that night. The other girl says she knows about the party and Jackie looks pissed. What is up with Jackie's hair? She's got it in two braids, and she's wearing a headband too. She's like a soccer-playing Pocahontas. Soccerhontas. ["Too bad Dino's not there to see it, since he's so desperate to Poke Her Hontas." -- Wing Chun] Other Friend comes over and says that she heard about the party. Jackie is pissed because she thought it was just going to be her and Dino tonight. Other Friend suggests that they go to a big party at the university instead, and Jackie agrees.
Dino hears his parents arguing and sneaks downstairs to eavesdrop. He hears his father saying that they can't go away this weekend because he has too much work to do. His mom says that this was the only weekend they could get the cabin. She spots Dino and assures him that it will be okay, and that they'll do something next weekend instead. She promises that it'll be fine. Dino walks off and freezetalks that he's heard his parents fight before, but now he feels like he's responsible for the success or failure of their marriage. That's healthy. Dino suddenly remembers about the party, which has to be cancelled since his parents are staying home, and runs out of the house.
Miss Young gives Ben a ride. Not like that. Yet. He thanks her for being cool in the liquor store, but gives her shit for being inconsistent. She admits he has a point, and then says that he doesn't know her yet. Ben freezetalks that she says "yet" like he will know her in the future. Ben's cell rings, so he picks it up. Dino says he has to cancel the party because his parents aren't going away. Ben promises to take care of it. Dino hears Miss Young's ovary music and asks what Ben is listening to. Ben stammers something as Miss Young turns up the radio. It's like she wants to get caught. Ben says he has to go before Dino gets too suspicious. Ben tells Miss Young that he's free tonight, and Miss Young says that she's not. Ben is disappointed and Miss Young says that he can tag along this afternoon while she runs errands. They are dumb. And so going to be caught. But probably not until sweeps.
Jonathan contemplates a frozen gel pack before stuffing it down his pants. Dino calls to tell Jonathan that the party is off. Jonathan is relieved, because it means that he won't have to use his cancer-ridden penis. Jonathan promises to call everyone with the news.