Life on Mars

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B | Grade It Now!
Here's to the curliqued whimsy of fate!

After a few minutes of this tedious "dancing," Sam's found a guru who's busy telling a circle of nubile acolytes that "Yesterday has vanished. Tomorrow is an illusion --one that hypnotizes the conventional man into a deep, deep sleep. And most never awaken. [points to Sam] Isn't that right, my friend?" Sam pauses, disoriented in the stillness and silence, then says hoarsely, "I think everything is an illusion." The guru near-imperceptibly shakes his head, then says in an echoey voice, "Your mind is creating every moment of the future, and every moment of the past. The future is a fevered dream, when now is all there is, and all there is, is now." Sam's having a trippy headspace moment, and it doesn't help that Windy comes up right then to whisper in his ear, "Maybe 2008 is the illusion and 1973 is the reality." Sam whips around to face her -- but Windy's gone as he asks, "What did you say?" I'm wondering: did Sam ever tell Windy he was from 2008? If not ... spooky!

We cut to Sam waking up to Windy singing, "Rise and shine and give gosh your glory-glory!" She brings him a cup of something hot as Sam stammered, "Did we-- did you --" "Just get here?" she brightly asks. Windy says she dropped Sam off fairly late. He has also been doing research, and Windy picks that time to reveal her crush on someone from Hawaii Five-0. She asks Sam, "Do you ever say that, 'Book 'em, Dan-o'?" "I would, if I worked with a guy named Dan-o," Sam replies. He's not so much of a morning person, is he? Windy responds, "You should hire one. How cool would that be?"

The two move on to what Sam's researching: himself and his parents, trying to find out what footprints they've left across the early 1970s. There are not a whole lot of concrete facts for Sam to work with but "I remember little things -- like the GI Joes I hid in a Thom McAn box behind a loose baseboard in my bedroom. Did I make that up?" Sam collapses backward onto his bed and wonders how much he drank last night. Windy tells him, "That was pure bliss you were on -- the maharishei's special. I told you he was righteous!" There's a knock on the door -- it's Annie. She brightly tells him that Gene's rampaging around the precinct looking for Sam and "if we don't get this case solved soon, he's going to burst into flames!" Sam asks Annie to hold on for two seconds so he can, you know, put on a shirt and get rid of the wifty New Ager watching the goings-on, but Annie sticks a foot in the door so she can report on how she didn't didn't find anything in Reeves' car down in the impound lot. Sam slams the door and gets dressed quickly, and Windy's on Annie now: "How come Annie's not allowed in?" Sam can't quite explain why not, so he rushes out with an "I'll talk to you later." Oh, Sam, you're not even brushing your teeth? You will be the reason the Cavity Creeps will have to be invented!

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Life on Mars




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