The road trip continues, with accompaniment courtesy of The Escape Club's "Wild Wild West." If I rate this so-far-lame episode higher than it deserves, you'll know why. Who can resist this? And Baze's dancing-from-the-shoulder-up? Pretty awesome. Not as awesome as the world's biggest corn dog, though. Cate objects, but Baze is a man who appreciates the finer things in life and, thus, insists they stop to sample the "local cuisine." They take many pictures, watched by the sourest corn dog server I've ever seen in my 27 years on earth. After filling their bellies full o' delicious, the road trip carries on, halted briefly by Cate's millionth bathroom break and Baze's prankster side winning out as he waits for her to grab the door handle before peeling out -- several times.
Once back on the road, Baze lectures Lux about not letting anything distract you while you're on the road. Considering they're behind a chicken truck and Baze has the attention span of a howler monkey, I know this is going nowhere good. Baze tells Cate to loosen up a little when she gets her panties in a twist about calling her florist. His comment prompts her to say that her wedding is important to her, even if it's not important to him, and ask why he hasn't RSVP'd. Even Lux is shocked by the slight. He claims he has a conflict, but when Cate presses him says something vague about the bar. Of course Baze chooses this time to try to pass the chicken truck all while looking away from the road and at Cate. I'll save you the suspense: They don't get plowed down by a charter bus, but it's pretty close. Baze tries to salvage his lesson, looking back to assure Lux that he is "completely aware of [his] surroundings." While he's looking back, the chicken truck suddenly breaks, and Baze rear-ends it, sending the chickens crashing onto his hood. One chicken awesomely, now freed from its cage, plants itself on and gives the three nitwits a deathly serious "Bitch, please" look. I heard that, chicken!
Later, Baze persists in playing the teacher by telling Lux how to handle accidents. It's just another excuse to shill for State Farm. Next! The family assembles to get the news from the mechanic. It's not good. He tells them Baze's radiator is punctured and that he can't fix it until tomorrow. What's worse, all the hotel rooms are booked on account of the local toddler pageant that night. He points them to a bed and breakfast that might have one room left. Baze says they can't possibly all sleep in the same room. The mechanic, God bless him and his folksy common sense, points out that it's better than their only other alternative, the truck.