Life Unexpected

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Let There Be Lux
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

We open on shots of Portland, Oregon, as a morning radio host, Cate, and her partner in crime, Ryan, play Sex-Marry-Kill. They've chosen the name Jessica, and predictable Jessica Simpson jokes ensue. While they talk about Cate's distaste for marriage, a teenage girl listens in her bathroom and smiles along. Cate moans about her cloyingly romantic boyfriend, and Ryan gives her the full snark about how she should have gone hurled a remote at him for being such a sap. As they banter, the youngster takes off her towel to check out her tittays. As you do. And then AAAAH! It's the ghost of Ron Weasley! No, just the girl's perv of a younger brother. The girl hurls her shampoo bottle at him (see what they're doing there with the parallel actions?) and stomps into the kitchen to complain to her mother. Make that foster mother, pointedly named Foster, who essentially says she's not getting paid enough to care about whiny little bitches. The precocious girl, Lux, takes her to task for being a lame parent and tells her that after her sixteenth birthday in two days, none of them will have this problem. Lux is going to get emancipated and blow this banana stand. Tough talk for a girl in a borrowed towel. The mum doesn't seem to down about it. She practically tells Lux not to let the door hit her on the way out.

As Lux wanders around town, we join a sleeping guy and his high-strung girlfriend. She searches for her running shoes and dresses him down a bit for being layabout bar owner. He says he's just following his dream to drink for free. Now that's a career path I can get behind. He finds her running shoe -- which he was sleeping on? -- and pulls her back into the bed for some more hanky panky. Ahhhh, morning breath make outs.

Lux continues her mysterious journey on the bus as Cate and Ryan take a call from a fan. The caller wants to find the right guy, settle down, and have a million babies. Obviously this is a fictive world in which no Duggars exist because Cate zeroes in on the fact that having a million babies is physically impossible. Ryan reads between the lines, calling Cate out for being such a baby hater at 32 years old. Crosscut between Cate explaining that the only person one can depend on is herself and Lux walking the streets alone like a spunky little ragamuffin. The show ends as Lux finds her destination -- a bar. Could it be? Yeah, it totally is. Cate and Ryan continue their quick-witted banter off air, revealing that the lobbed remote in question was aimed at Ryan's head. They're not just co-hosts. They're lovers! And she hates children, the enterprise of love, and any sort of commitment. Get it?

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Life Unexpected

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