Life on Mars

Episode Report Card
Mr. Sobell: B | 1302 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
You Better Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

We jump to Sam spilling his guts to Crocker at a location far away from the prying ears of Gene Hunt. Yes, Crocker is intrigued to hear about this possibility of rogue cops involved in the robberies -- very intrigued. Sam thanks him for his help and his discretion. At this point, Admiral Akbar would have shouted himself hoarse before shrugging and taking a shot of whatever Rebel fleet commanders drink to dull the pain of another botched mission.

Speaking of spacemen, though, our little metallic friend from earlier is back -- it's the robot from the jail cell, and it bears more than a striking resemblance to the Mars rover. And it's managed to track him down here in the mean streets of New York City where it flashes a light on his face. Cue the Bowie music and the attendant flashback -- first we get the shot of Sam chasing after a red dress in a field, which we first saw when Sam got whacked by that SUV. Then he's carrying a flashlight and calling out for Maya in what appears to be a spooky old house from the Scooby Doo Collection. That's when Maya pops out and goes "Boo!" and they both have a good laugh. "Who says "boo" in this day and age?" the flashback version of Sam teases. "You're like a cartoon character out of the funny papers." "Who says funny papers in this day and age?" Maya playfully counters. Well, Hunt and the gang in that earlier scene, but it's rapidly becoming clear that those guys are all part of Sam's fragile eggshell mind. Anyhow, I guess Sam does remember what Maya looks like after all. To his credit, he's not disappointed that she turns out to be Lisa Bonet, though the whole flashback thing has left him a bit shaken. As would you be if a Mars rover suddenly appeared and showed you scenes from your life before scurrying off into the darkness of a commercial break.

When we return, Sam's back at his apartment having Chinese food and scribbling notes on a piece of paper -- either he's sussing out the AAA Check Cashing case or his run-in with the Mars rover is going on his Dead, Unconscious or Crazy List. But who's peeking out from inside the doorway, calling a name that's lighter than air? Who's popping round to bring Sam lasagna? Everyone knows it's Windy. She is, disappointingly, clothed this time around, taking away her most compelling character trait. Anyhow, it's your typical lasagna -- pasta, tomatoes, ricotta cheese, some zucchini, a little marijuana, other herbs and vegetables. Sam would like very much to back up to the part about the marijuana-laced pasta dish. "You know I'm a cop," Sam tells Windy cautiously. "Then you must get the really good stuff," she replies. No generic, off-brand grass for our man Sam. Anyhow, Sam would like to spend less time ingesting marijuana and more time picking what's left of Windy's brain in regards to that thing she mentioned about sending messages to loved ones through the clouds. "Do the clouds ever respond?" he asked. They do not, Windy tells him. "I never hear from the clouds," she says, "but the stars -- they won't shut up." Uh... huh. How much marijuana did you say was in that lasagna again? "Because the stars speak for the lonely blue hearts," she continues. "And the lonely blue hearts tell the truth." And with that Windy is off -- off to flit and float through this great big wide world of ours. Or possibly to go and get high. Well, high-er to be entirely accurate.

Life on Mars

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