Producer: "There's no way someone with a name would sign on for this piece of crap. Especially if they read the script."
Director: "Hmm... maybe we can get a young eager starlet, someone who people will know from a reality show or something."
Producer: "I'll send the script over to Dina Lohan, for her less-talented daughter Ali. People will flock to see Ali in Troll because they love Lindsay. By the time they realize how crappy it really is, they'll already have paid their 12 bucks and we'll be rich. Rich I tell you. Mwa ha ha."
I love how behind Ali's head while she's talking about how she "doesn't want to do bad," there is a framed picture of Lindsay. Not like a candid shot, like a magazine shot. Really? I give up with this show. It is trying to be like "We Lohans are more than just Lindsay!" but every second they are mentioning her name or showing photos of her. Could be the editing, could be the Lohans' grasping at whatever straws they can.
Cody's fooling around with a basketball. By himself. Of course. Nina goes out to make nice and wants to play Horse with him. He makes fun of her b-ball skills. At one point he says "fail" when she does something wrong. But then she finally gets the hang of this whole dribbling thing and they seem to be bonding or whatever. He needs a haircut. Nina tells shaggy Cody that she loves him and she'd never try and get between him and his brother. She kisses him, and asks if he loves her back. He's all like "whatever," then proceeds to pick on her sports skills some more. Aw.
Nina runs up to Michael to tell him about how she bonded with Cody. Michael asks if they talked about stuff. So eloquent, this one. He thinks if they spend more time together he won't pick on Nina so much. This entire storyline is mind-numbing.
The next day, Dina screams that they are going to be late, while Ali is writhing around on Michael's bed claiming that she doesn't feel good. Michael says this is a pile of shit. I'm inclined to agree with him, even if he is kind of a dolt. Nana says that she's got anxiety. Perhaps Ali actually read the script and realized what a heap of crap it was and developed a fake illness, though that's probably giving her too much credit. Ali says that she's not going. Dina says to deal. Michael tries to reason with her. Nina says to just get it over with. Michael says she's getting pissed off.