Living Lohan

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Lady Lola: B- | Grade It Now!
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Uncharted Territory

Ali continues to voice her concerns about the track. Now that she's spent two whole days recording (not to mention performing Ashlee Simpson-style on an empty stage), she believes she has figured her artistic identity and cannot get behind this song. She grabs her bag and flees the scene as Sue promises to talk to Dina-saur. Jeremy walks back in. But where's Ali?

More sunbathing beauties, then Dina-saur and Cody greet a hotel executive in their suite. Dina-saur VOs that Cody is ridiculously bored. The exec invites them up to "wish happy birthday to an important guest." And who would that guest be? Why it's Hugh Hefner himself! But first we see Holly Madison, Hef's Number One Girlfriend, and one of the three Girls Next Door (another of E!'s impressively un-self-aware guilty pleasures).

Cody hides behind Dina-saur as two massive bags of saline otherwise known as Holly come flying at him. Dina-saur says, "We love your show... big fans." And wouldn't you know Dina-saur is the kind of mom to watch a show about Playboy bunnies with her kids? All Cody can stutter out in his interview is that Hef's girlfriends are very pretty. Cue Girlfriend #3, Kendra, who will serve as the conductor on Cody's train wreck of a life. She asks if they've seen the hot tub.

Before Cody has to worry about wearing a bathing suit in mixed company or doubling over trying to hide an unsightly boner, Hef enters the room. Hef is charmingly gregarious with little Cody, but the boy can't get a word out as he is surrounded by boobs. They take a picture while Cody VOs that, unlike Hef, he's a one-woman kind of guy. Look at that, he cracked a joke! How cute! Of course, his woman at present is a soccer ball, but we'll just hope it's a phase.

We return to the studio, where everyone is singing Eman's praises while Jeremy tries to thug-walk around and exert his masculinity. Everyone pipes down as he enters the room, except Ali, who greets him entirely too enthusiastically. Way to put on your poker face, A-Lo. Sue gets to break the news that Ali has vetoed the song. Ali explains her reservations to Jeremy, and he's totally thrown. He tries to talk her down, but just like in their last confrontation, Ali won't let him get a word in edgewise. Congratulations, Mr. Big Producer Man, you've been out-argued by a 14-year-old girl...twice.

Jeremy reveals that an a-hole can't change his stripes by insinuating that Ali's trying to get out of the song because it's too hard. She worsens the situation as she explains that she is having difficulty wrapping her tiny mind around the demo because it was sung by a man, unlike on Eman's female-sung demo. Jeremy repeats that idiotic statement back to her, like "Are you kidding me?" Ali shoots a baffled look over to Sue, who gives her the "Shut up while you're ahead" face and digs her out of that hole. Then Ali pulls out the trump card, saying Dina-saur said from the beginning that the song wasn't right for her.

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Living Lohan

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