Man alive. I thought maybe I was going to sit smugly on my Sports Night recapper ivory tower forever. Let the others have their Ally McBeals, their Temptation Islands, their 7th Heavens. I got the good show -- the show that wasn't treated fairly by its network, but at least went out on a high note. Sure, I started to feel like an interloper among the recappers after my show was relegated to the Permanent Hiatus section, but any time I felt like reliving some Network Executive glory, I could smack down some uppity poster pretending to know something about hockey and then hide behind Sars when the fur started to fly.
Then, this. Bachelorettes in Alaska. Wing Chun asked me to do it -- and for those of you who think the Heads of Programming call up the recappers on giant floor-to-ceiling video screens, like the Superfriends had, it doesn't happen. We get summoned via email. ["Our R&D team is working on that floor-to-ceiling thing as we speak, though. And I did send you a note via carrier pigeon but apparently it got sucked into a jet engine somewhere over Flin Flon." -- Wing Chun] Wing gave me a rah-rah speech about taking one for the TWoP team, that I should close my eyes and think of Moose Jaw and all that, and I agreed.
But I hate reality shows. I watched some of Survivor, the first one, until Colleen got voted off. I even, mea culpa, watched a few episodes of Big Brother when a foot injury kept me in my La-Z-Boy for a week a couple of summers ago. But Love Cruise? The Mole? The Amazing Race? Nada. They don't register. I know nothing about them. But I didn't want to go into this in a negative frame of mind, so I tried to think of a benefit of recapping Bachelorettes. I mean, when fans of a half-hour of crap like Titus are dissing your show on the FOX message boards, you've got enough problems. Finally, an upside came to me: when I did Sports Night, and I clicked on TWoP's pull-down listing of shows and forums, I always had to scroll really far down the alphabetized list to get to Sports Night. Bachelorettes? It's right at the top. I'm saving precious split-seconds every time I do it! So that's something. Thus deluded, I settle in for the first episode.