Now poor Mike is subjected to the indignity of having to choose between two women who rejected him, which might explain why he's not all that enthusiastic as he chooses Andrea over Sissie. Santagati banishes Sissie who, in an interview, says, "I didn't want to go on a date with anybody today. Or ever. It's amazing what negative body language and no eye contact will do," because, oh yeah, she doesn't want to get picked. For the second time, we're treated to the Sissie spin on not getting picked and if you've got this show on tape, as I UNFORTUNATELY DO, you can check and see for yourself that what Sissie calls "negative body language and no eye contact" apparently consists of smiling, clapping, and direct eye contact.
Time for the weekly annoying scene where Santagati sends the women off with their new men and then repeats the ol' blah-blah about the Men on Ice having to "wait and wonder if they've lost you forever."
Commercials. How annoying are alcohol commercials that make a mockery out of the whole "drink responsibly" thing they have to do? Like the guy who slashes his own tires to prevent himself from driving drunk and it's played for laughs? How horrifying is that?
Day 14. 17°. Rebekah and Keith are going "ski jouring," whatever that is. We see them in the car in the backseat and Keith makes some lame joke about eating beluga whale vs. caviar or something. In an interview, Rebekah says they talked a bit, but that she slept for most of the drive, because she only got three or four hours' sleep the night before (though she doesn't say why). In an interview, Keith says it was kind of awkward sitting in the back seat while his date slept.
Turns out "ski jouring" is getting dogs to pull you while you're on skis. We are given the sublime pleasure of watching Rebekah face- and ass-plant many, many times. In an interview, Keith says that Rebekah's really nice and that she's always smiling. In an interview, Rebekah says, "He's a great guy. I don't feel a connection." Poor Keith. So far he's the only man on the show with whom Rebekah hasn't felt a connection. Then she blah blahs that she misses Jason, and also that she can't believe she misses Jason.
Karen and Brad. Photo safari. Brad's wearing this huge furry hat. In an interview, Karen calls a photo safari a "cute idea," and right behind "grown women who speak in baby voices" on my list of Things That Annoy Me is "grown women who are always calling things 'cute.'" Blah blah, Karen says something to the effect that Brad's hat makes him look like something that's been hunted. Apparently it's a fox hat, and we know this because Karen and Brad spend about two hours in interviews talking about the stupid hat, and I can only imagine that it's because nothing interesting happened on this date. We are also shown a series of video stills of the scenery and wildlife, which they'd have us believe are actual photos taken by these two, since they're accompanied by the tried-and-true shutter-click sound effect. In interviews, they each blah blah about how nice the other is. Brad takes pictures of Karen. Karen takes pictures of Brad. I jam my eyes open with toothpicks to keep awake. Finally, this date ends.