Looking for Love
Oh, The Drama!

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The Sum of All Tears

In an interview, Tim says he's willing to have "that conversation" with Cecile but the night before they "screwed around" and now he's dug himself "an even deeper hole."

Exterior shot shows night descending on the Northern Light. 8 PM. Group dinner. In an interview, Bob and his mullet explain that they just found out Brent and Sissie are pretty much "an item," so I guess Sissie didn't say anything about it on their date, and so much for not leading anyone on, eh, Sissie? Bob and his mullet say it was "disconcerting" to find out they don't really have much chance with her.

Now we focus on the new group, as Doug voice-overs that it was weird when everyone got back to the Northern Light because there were all these couples "holding hands and prancing around and having a good time" and then we see...wait a minute, did he just say "prancing around"? At the dinner, we see the four new guys sitting together at one end of the table, and Doug is leading the discussion on how extraneous they all feel, but the whole conversation had to be subtitled because the genius cameraman elected to film this with Cecile in the foreground and she is loudly blathering on about getting some "homemade jelly" (I think) "from a Eskimo [sic]" and the other women are all a-twitter at the mention of a real live Eskimo, I guess, and I forgot that Americans still use the white-man-label "Eskimo" but you'd think if anyone would be careful about treating another culture like a Disneyland exhibit, it'd be Cecile, the only non-white person on this show. Meanwhile, there's Doug -- who, being a young, middle-class American male is a member of pretty much every possible privileged and non-discriminated-against segment of society -- joking about "segregation."

10 PM. "Reality Check." Did anyone else feel annoyed at the way they dropped in this brand-new completely contrived segment and tried to pretend it was part of the show all along? I mean, every episode they repeat the instructions for all the regular segments of the show, but for this we have to put up with Santagati holding up some scrolls or whatever and telling the group that he has some "provocative questions" and he reminds everyone to be honest. "Marriage is a big deal," says the host of a show that is, metaphorically speaking, wiping its ass with all the good and romantic and ideal aspects that marriage can possibly represent. Do we really have to put up with this? Kristian passes out the scrolls. In an interview, Rebekah says Cecile asked her about getting a weird vibe off Tim, and Rebekah says she wasn't sure it was her place to say anything. Terry reads the first question, which asks "the last time you lied to a member of the opposite sex." Wow. What a coincidence that Tim is right this moment in a quandary about lying to Cecile and that happens to be the first question on this week's Reality Check segment! It would be even crazier if Tim had to answer first and -- whoa! That's exactly what happens! Even though someone else is offering to go first, for some unexplained reason, Terry and Andrea ignore that and make Tim go first, like, let's not make this look too much like a set-up, shall we? Then Tim hems and haws for about five hours while everybody, including Cecile, looks uncomfortable.

In an interview, Rebekah says that when Tim started stalling, her "heart dropped." And I swear, the clip of Tim stalling lasted a full five minutes. And he's doing this weird contortion thing with his mouth like he's chewing or something, and it looked kind of like when I had my bottom wisdom teeth pulled which was an ordeal in and of itself that I might have recounted in an overly long digression in a Sports Night recap but I can't remember and anyway until the sockets healed I was always getting food stuck in them and then would have to spend a few minutes after dinner contorting my cheeks in order to suck the food out of my wisdom teeth sockets and anyone who has had their wisdom teeth pulled knows what I'm talking about and that is what Tim looked like he was doing here. And it was made more annoying by this choir that kicks in and the camera zooming in, and just how dramatic and tense did FOX expect this to be when Tim's blabbing to everyone that he's not interested and when they've already shown the clip about fifty million times of Cecile spazzing out in the bathroom? But then we go to a commercial, like this is supposed to be a cliffhanger and we'll definitely stay tuned!

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Looking for Love

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