Kate says, "So why don't you get rid of 'em? Why hold on to something that makes you feel sad?" Kate's looking pretty sad herself, as is Jack. Do they make one another sad, or do they want each other when they feel sad? Yes. Before Jack can answer, although I'm not sure he would have, the phone rings. Jack looks at her, like he's not sure what do with this strange new ringing sound. Kate seems perplexed, too. The hell? Finally, she stands. "Go ahead. I'll see you at the airport, okay?" Jack nods and Kate high-tails it out of Jack's place like it was Craphole, itself. Jack FINALLY answers the phone. It's Ben, who almost sounds like he's crying. Jack asks if he's okay. We cut to a scene of Ben at a payphone (do they still have payphones?) at the Marina. "Listen, we don't have much time. I've been, uh... sidetracked, and I need you to pick up Locke's body and take it to the airport." The camera pans around to give us a full profile shot. Ben's hair is wet and his face is covered in blood, which seems disproportionate to the few small scrapes I can see. "The coffin is at Simon's Butcher Shop. Corner of Grande and Hayes." Jack wants to know what's happened to Ben that he can't retrieve Locke's corpse. Ben says, "Just do it, please." Jack hangs up and we jump to the Butcher Shop. Jill knows him when she lets him in, so Jack and Jill go up the...ah...I already did that in the recaplet, and it was weak, then. I won't punish you twice. They go back into the meat locker, where there are sides of beef hanging and full Lockes (okay, just the one) already boxed up and ready to travel. Jill wants to know what's in the bag, but Jack shoots her a dirty look when she asks, so she apologizes, and excuses herself to pull the van around back.
Once she's gone, Jack braces himself, opens the casket, then removes Locke's shoes and replaces them with Christian's. Feeling like an asshat, he starts talking to the body. "Wherever you are John, you must be laughing your ass off that I'm actually doing this, because this is even crazier than you are." Long time -- no see, I guess. Once he's done, he takes out the still unopened suicide note, and sticks it inside Locke's jacket. "And here. You can have that back. I've already heard everything you had to say, John. You wanted me to go back. I'm going back. Rest in peace."