Lost

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Ben, You're Always Running Here and There
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!
Previously on Lost Ben stabs Jacob to death and then Faucke punts the corpse into the fire pit. Jack sees (some familiar) names and corresponding numbers on the lighthouse wheel, including an extra-bold 23 Shephard, and freaks out on Hurley. Jacob attempts a cute-off with Hurley, as he explains that he lured Hugo and Jack away from the Temple because, "Someone's coming there. Someone bad." Cue the Great Temple Smoke-Out and Desecration. Original Recipe Smokey kills everyone who isn't nailed down, claimed, chosen, a candidate, hiding in a pit, running for their lives, or previously murdered by Sayid. Speaking of... Ben tries to coax Sayid away from the Murky Mikvah (and the bodies of Lennon and Yoko) by telling him that there's still time, but the darkness in Sayid had grown such that he can only look all sleekly sick yet still somehow sexy, as he smirks, "Not for me." Ben backs away -- slowly at first -- and then high tails it out of the Murkey Mikvah Mezzanine to parts unknown. Now we're all caught up, and it's time for our latest installment in the very last season of Lost.

Aside: After we nuke ourselves to oblivion, nay -- after that -- after even Keith Richards and the cockroaches have fallen, Benjamin Linus will still be plugging along. He may have a thing or two to learn about telling the truth, but the man's survival instincts are...to die for.

Currently, in the Island Reality: Ben runs through the jungle, and after he falls flat on his face, he looks up to see a line of torches passing through brush. But it's not the wood elves leaving Middle Earth forever for the Grey Havens. It's Ilana, Frank, Sun, and Miles (who, henceforth, will be known as Ilana & Co, unless I get bored, and then elves it is).

Ben is on Ilana & Co. like white on rice. He startles them, so they surround him, and Ilana demands to know where Jarrah is. Ben, still panting, huffs, "I'm fine. Thank you." Ilana's in no mood for licking his sore ego, so she ignores his attitude and demands Sayid-intel. Ben says, "Considering that he just killed Dogen, I don't think he's going to be joining us." He adds that Sayid killed the interpreter, too. When Ilana asks if he's sure, Ben says, "He was standing over their dead bodies holding a bloody dagger, so yeah, I'm pretty sure." Remember that, 'cause Miles will.

Ben suggests they go to the beach where the Losties used to live. "At least we'll have the water at our backs, and it's familiar territory. Anybody else got a better idea?" They all look at each other for a moment before Ilana says, "No." Back to the beach baby, yeah!

L.A. Reality: Dr. Benjamin Linus writes Able was I ere I saw Elba on the chalkboard as he lectures his class on Napoleon in exile. You'll never know how close I came to headlining this episode, "Linus was I ere I saw Sunil," until I remembered that you all don't know my Lost-watching friend Sunil (although he is famous on the internet). At any rate, the parallels fall fast and furious as Dr. Linus lectures that "it was on this island that everything changed; that everything finally became clear..." He thinks he's still talking about Napoleon and Elba, but we point and laugh as he gets into the part about how it was the loss of power that was a fate worse than death for the wee Emperor.

When the bell rings, Principal Reynolds (William Atherton) is at the door doing his best Ben Stein drone. "Walk with me." Due to budget crises and other events above Ben's "pay grade" Reynolds is pulling Ben in to cover after-school detention. This will mean Ben has to give up leading the history club. Doing so to watch a group of burnouts is so not Ben's cuppa. When Ben argues that they should be providing for the students who are ambitious and invested in their studies, Reynolds sneers that the history club isn't for the kids: "It makes you feel needed. Unfortunately, for now, you're needed. In detention. Thanks for your understanding, Linus." After Reynolds walks off, Ben snivels, "It's Dr. Linus. Actually."

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Lost

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