And then, what a fantastic tale Jack spins. Yeah, he knew Kate; they were both passengers on Oceanic Flight 815. Did he know she was a fugitive being transported by a U.S. Marshal? Well, he learned that eventually. From Kate herself. He never spoke to the marshal, because the marshal died in the crash, don't you know! "Miss Austen told me," says Jack. He says he never bothered to ask if Kate was guilty, because he assumed there'd been some kind of mistake. Why? Because Kate's awesome, that's why! Or, as Jack puts it, "Only eight of us survived the crash. We landed in the water. I was hurt, pretty badly. In fact, if it weren't for her, I would never have made it to the shore." Kate squirms in her seat as Jack testifies. "She took care of me. She took care of all of us. She gave us first aid, gave us water, found food. Using dyes made from plants and a rudimentary printing press made of bamboo, she published children's books that she read to us at night to comfort us. She tried to save the other two, but..." Kate stands up and tells him to stop, since this has nothing to do with anything. "This is my trial, and I don't want him to say anything else." Duncan is all, I was finished with him anyway.
So the DA gets up to cross-examine, telling Jack his testimony was very moving. "I just have one question for you. Do you love the defendant?" And Duncan is all "Objection!" and the judge says, "You opened this door. I'm going to allow this!" because by law any courtroom scene on television requires a judge to say "I'm going to allow this" at least once, and Jack looks like he swallowed his tongue. The DA repeats the question. "No. Not anymore," says Jack, displaying about ninety percent of the facial tics police interrogators use to determine when a suspect is lying. Which is probably just fine with the DA, who smirks like she just got Col. Jessep to admit he ordered the Code Red.
Since New Otherton isn't exactly a beehive of activity, I'm not sure why Hurley and Sawyer couldn't have each had their own house. There has to be a better reason other than annoying Odd Couple humour, right? See, Sawyer's trying to read, while Hurley tries to decide between watching Xanadu and something called Satan's Doom. I don't know if that last one is real or not, but if it is, I'm adding it to my ZipList right now. Sawyer bitches at Hurley to turn it down. Hurley, it appears, has chosen Xanadu.
There's a knock at the door. Sawyer opens it up to find Kate. "Can I come in?" she says, and doesn't even wait for an answer before breezing right past Sawyer. Kate says hello to Hurley, who winks at Sawyer. "You got something in your eye, Hugo?" asks Sawyer, and Hurley's eyes dart over to Kate. Before Hurley can start poking his index finger through a ring he makes with his other hand, Sawyer suggests to Kate they go talk in the kitchen, and the two of them make small talk while Sawyer pours Kate a glass of Dharma wine from a big honkin' box. "You're terrible at this, Freckles," says Sawyer. Kate's all, what? "At least be woman enough to tell me you wanna use me for something," he says, and Kate obliges by telling him exactly that. "For what?" says Sawyer. "For Ben. I want you to help me bust him out," she says.
So Sawyer shows up on Locke's doorstep with a backgammon board. "You're on," says Locke. As they set up the pieces, Locke says, "Do you think I know what I'm doing?" Sawyer's all, huh? so Locke asks if he regrets following him out there, and if he's worried about what they should do next. "All I know is I'd be a lot more worried if I was sitting on that beach," says Sawyer. Locke asks him what the rest of the group is saying. "Baaaaa," says Sawyer, and in case Locke (or anyone else) doesn't get that, Sawyer says, "That's the nice thing about sheep. They're predictable." Oh, but he's not sure about Kate. What about Kate, asks Locke. "I need your word you ain't gonna do nothing to her," says Sawyer. Confused, Locke agrees, and Sawyer says she came to him a while ago, and asked for his help busting Ben out of Locke's basement. "She talked to that guy, Bruce Lee from the freighter, the guy you got locked up. He told her to bring Ben down there." Kate doesn't know where Miles is, says Locke. You mean, down by the boathouse, asks Sawyer, throwing Locke for a loop. "If Hugo knows, everybody knows," says Sawyer.