Now, one thing that's brilliant about this show is that you look like an ass if you nitpick -- because how can you nitpick this insanity? So heehaw and this isn't a nitpick so much as a question blah blah blah donkey-cakes. But...if the original flight 815 was 1,000 miles off course when it crashed, why is this flight from Sydney to L.A. flying over the sunken remains of the island? Or is it not? Or did the sunken remains drift? If the Jughead bomb caused the island to (and possibly drift), how did the buildings, swing-set, fence and all manner of stuff remain intact? I mean, I saw upright, green trees under there, y'all. When Locke moved the island, did he move it through space as well as time, but if so, why didn't season 5 play out under water? If he did move it through space, how was Eloise Hawking's magical science doohickey able to predict that Ajira 316 would be flying over it in 2007? How did that thing work, anyhow? I...don't get it. I know. I know. Welcome back to Lost. Right.
And it's back to the future we go. Jack drops the bomb in the shaft. The bomb fails to ignite. Juliet gets dragged into the shaft. Sawyer struggles to save her and they cry and cry. Maybe I do too. WHAT OF IT? Then Juliet falls to the bottom. Sawyer cries some more. Juliet bangs her rock on the Jughead and KABOOM everything fades to white. We get to see this again, even though we just relived it during the Previouslies. Gee, thanks so much, Darlton.
We close in on an eye, but it's not Jack's. Right away, it's clear that it belongs to Kate. She's lying flat on her back and there's something wrong with the sound on my TV. NOT NOW! I curse my ABC affiliate or possibly my cable provider and turn on the closed captioning, which tells me the sound is muffled. I pause the DVR to reverse the curse. Kate rolls over, which is a splendidly bad idea, almost as bad an idea as having cage-sex in front of a security camera, because it turns out she's not on the ground. She's in a damned tree; and almost falls out of it. Her gasps and cries for help are muffled. She finally climbs down from the tree and wanders until Miles finds her. She tackles him before she realizes who he is. He can't hear Kate when she asks what happened and where they are, but then she spies a familiar site through the vines. We know it's the door to the Swan hatch, but Miles doesn't. He asks her what it is. Kate says, "We're back," and runs off. Miles catches up with her when she stops at the hatch-pit. Miles asks if it's the Swan site. It kind of is, but Kate says, "No," because she knows that he means to ask if they're looking at ground zero of the Jughead bomb detonation. She further clarifies: "That's the hatch -- after Desmond blew it up." Whole 'nother explosion -- you dig, Miles? Miles guesses we're not in 1977. I'm guessing he's right. Kate has no time for guessing though, because she spies both her boyfriends lying unconscious on the jungle floor. She sees Sawyer first, but it's to Jack that she runs. 'Shippers, make of that what you will. She rouses him and when he learns they're at the hatch, he says, "They built it?" The next thing you know, he's getting kicked in the head by Sawyer and even though I like Jack, I laugh like a loon. He falls off the edge and all the way down into the hatch-pit as Sawyer yells, "YOU WERE WRONG!" Kate scurries down the vines to get Jack. Sawyer follows right after her, yelling all the way. "THAT'S THE DAMN SWAN HATCH. JUST LIKE WE LEFT IT. BLOWN UP -- JUST LIKE WE LEFT IT." I'm not transcribing his whole rant. I can barely listen to it right now. It's too soon. At any rate, he is hurt and angry because Juliet is dead on account of the whole cockamamie Jack Daniels plan that Sawyer never wanted any part of in the first place, but in the end, totally committed to. Jack's voice breaks as he does his best to apologize, but I don't see any tears. Is this yet another new reality, or do I just need HDTV?