In the first of hopefully many more to come, it's a Lucho Libre grudge match on Lost! The Others have opted to make themselves some cheap entertainment on ye olde desert Island by handcuffing Juliet and Kate together and throwing them in the middle of the jungle. After some triple X action-y action, the fight slows down when the monster makes an appearance. Don't worry, the fun starts up again when Juliet breaks it to Kate that Jack saw the video of her and Sawyer! Them's fighting words! After another run-in with the monster, the girls make it back to Camp Other, only to find that all the Others have vanished, leaving only Jack and Sayid. They decide the only option is to head back to the beach. Jack insists on bringing Juliet, despite Kate and Sayid's protests.
Meanwhile, Sawyer is dealing with some serious karmic retribution. The Losties are sick of his bad acts and are determined to banish him from the camp. After a failed attempt at staging The Old Man and the Sea, he realizes that he must makes amends so he can stay in the camp. With Hurley's help, Sawyer makes fumbling, bumbling, idiotic amends, only to realize that the con man has been conned! By Hurley! Heavens to Murgatroyd!
In Flashback Land, Kate is still on the lam. The longest lam ever. But despite being wanted by the feds and stalked by one singularly Kate-obsessed Marshal, she really wants to see her mommy. When Kate saves Sawyer's con artist protÃ©gÃ© and, yes, baby mama, Cassidy, from a bad mark, Cassidy repays her kindness by helping Kate see her mom. Her mom, however, is totally a witch. As in Sabrina the Teenage. No wonder Kate is so troubled!
Kate is by herself in the rec room of the Others. She is whiling away the hours by twitching. Very productive use of time! She sees Juliet walk by the window, clutches her pool stick, and crouches by the door. When Juliet walks in, Kate nails her with a pool cue. Oh, well she was going to nail her, but apparently Juliet is a ninja. Which totally makes sense if you think about it. Juliet flips her over her shoulder and smashes her down. Juliet says she was just bringing her a sandwich. I guess that's ninja speak for "handing you your ass on a plate." Juliet turns on her heel and huffs out, leaving Kate lying on the ground with plenty of time for a flashback.
Kate is in Iowa. We know this because of the corn fields, as well as the Patsy Cline soundtrack. Little known fact about Iowa: the entire state has Patsy Cline playing in the background all the time like musak at the Piggly Wiggly. It's good for the ears of corn. Sorry, that was awful. Kate's car is broken down. It needs a new fan belt, and Kate is unimpressed with the three-day turnaround time. The repair guy says, "Welcome to Iowa." Another little known fact about Iowa is that "Three Days for a Fan Belt" is printed on their license plates. The repair guy introduces himself as Johnny, and Kate says she's Lucy. As they pull into the repair station, Sawyer's old flame/con artist protÃ©gÃ© is trying to make a buck with the cheap-o necklace scam that Sawyer taught her. The mark is not going for it, though, and wants Johnny to call the cops. Kate obviously has no interest in calling the cops because she has been on the run for about thirty years and, hey, why stop now? She asks to see the necklaces, because "her father owns a jewelry store" and she can probably spot a fake. She buys one, and the mark walks off shaking his head. Kate and the Lady Con walk the other way, and Kate asks for her money back. The Lady Con hands her the money and then totally looks a gift horse in the mouth by asking why Kate helped her. Kate says it was just one girl watching the back of another. Then she yells, "Girl Power!," turns on the Bikini Kill, dons a tiny shirt that says "Riot Grrrls Rule!" and is about to move to Olympia when the Lady Con smirks and says that Kate is probably stranded there and didn't want that guy calling the cops. She offers to giver her a ride into town if Kate will buy her a drink.
Back on the Island, Kate is playing with herself in the rec room. Playing backgammon with herself. She is still handcuffed. When the door opens, she snarls, "What?" But when Locke says her name, she jumps up to see him. He is not handcuffed. His hand is bandaged. She asks if he was captured, and he says he was, but only temporarily. My old friend, Mr. Conspiracy Theory, is IM-ing me about this, but I'm going to block him. Kate is confused by his temporary capture and gets even more confused when Locke says he came to say goodbye. He is leaving with the Others. Kate stares at him. She demands to know what they did to him. Is he brainwashed? Then she demands to know where Jack is. Locke explains that Jack isn't going anywhere. He is getting left behind like her. Kate stops. She grabs Locke and tells him that he can't trust them. If they promised him that he could go home, they are lying. Locke takes a deep breath, looks Kate square in the face, and tells her that he doesn't want to go home. She looks stupefied by this like someone just told her that they don't like kittens or rainbows or unicorns. Incomprehensible! Locke says that he wants her to know that he made a strong argument for her. He said she was a good person: Reliable, smart, and honest. Then they told him who she was and what she had done. He continues, "Let's say forgiveness is not one of their strong suits. Goodbye." He turns on his heel and walks out while Kate grabs him, confused and looking for some answers. She wants to know where Jack is or if he has seen Rousseau. He just says good luck and yells at the door, "Coming out" and all the gay chatter in the forums starts up again because he totally just came out of the closet.