Lost

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Flippin' The Bird

Light Claire is using a Bondi Beach t-shirt as a diaper for Aaron. This may or may not be the writers' commentary on Australian tourist attractions. Instead of re-setting the trap and catching a bird, Claire and Sun decide to rehash what happened. Sun says Claire has every right to be mad. Claire says that it doesn't make any sense. Desmond has never gone boar hunting before, and the boar never come close to the beach. Sun points out that whatever it is, the boys are still over there arguing about it. Sure enough, Desmond and Charlie are gesturing wildly at each down the beach. Claire asks Sun to watch the baby while she goes to get some answers.

Dark Claire apparently works as an ear piercer. So gross! As she is punching a hole in some lady's ear, the front door to the shop opens. Claire says she will be right there. She finishes up the maiming and goes to see that Jack's Dad has come in. He asks if he can buy her a cup of coffee. She declines. Jack's Dad says that he is leaving tonight and will be out of her nastily over-dyed hair forever. Can he please buy her one cup of coffee before he goes? She apparently agrees to go because the next minute they are sitting across from each other in a café. Dark Claire is anxiously fiddling with her black rubber bracelets and chewing her black fingernails. She is a Goth after all. Dark Claire breaks the silence by blurting: "So it's true." Jack's Dad says yes. How did Jack's Dad find out about the surgery? A doctor friend in Sydney called him as soon as she came to the hospital. Why did her mom tell her he was dead? Uh, Dark Claire? Duh. Obviously because he left her with so many wonderful memories. Jack's Dad sits up straight in the universal language that is good posture indicating that now he will tell her the truth. He and her mom had a fling. He got back to Los Angeles and got a phone call that she was pregnant and that she was going to have the baby. Dark Claire wants to know why he never wanted to see her. He claims that he used to come all the time when she was little, but he stopped because her aunt hates him. Oh come on. Aunt Bitchy hates everyone! Well, yes, there was Aunt Bitchy and there was the fact that her mom didn't like that he had an entire other family in Los Angeles. Wow. Claire's mom sure is picky.

Dark Claire wants to know why he came now. He could have paid the bills from the States. He says that he came because he wanted to help. Help what? Jack's Dad sits up straighter using posture (again!) to tell her that he will be imparting great wisdom that she may not want to hear. He tells her that her mother is alive, but not really living. She needs to make a decision, but she shouldn't make the decision based on her selfish desire to keep her mother around. It's what her mother would want. She should listen to her long-lost, always-thought-you-were-dead, had-a-one-night-stand-17-years-ago father on this. Who better to make life or death decisions for you then some dude you picked up in a bar 17 years ago? No, really. Quit laughing. Jack's Dad continues to talk over the peals of laughter: "While it is illegal to unhook the machines, I know ways that can ease her pain, nudge, nudge, wink, wink, and not face the legal consequences." Dark Claire won't listen to anymore of this malarkey. She says there is no way he came to ease her pain. Jack's Dad calls her "honey" in a feeble attempt at curtailing the earful he is about to get. It does not work. She says that paying the bills does not make him noble. She accuses Jack's Dad of just coming to fix a mistake he made 17 years ago. He comes down here just to try and convincer her to kill her mom? Just says go home. Go home to your real family. He may be her Dad, but she doesn't even know his name, and she wants it to stay that way. I agree. "Jack's Dad" is good enough for me. Jack's Dad wants her to kill her mom. Legally, of course. Jack's Dad does not want her to keep her mom alive for the wrong reasons. She needs to do what is right. Dark Claire stooge slaps him across the head. Well, she does that with her eyes anyway. Jack's Dad finally gets it, says goodbye, calls her "kiddo," and says it was great seeing her again. We all believe him.

Lost

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