Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B | Grade It Now!
I Will Be Your Father Issues

Jack keeps his cool, ignores Rotten Roger some more, and goes to get the bucket and mop and Roger starts to take chairs down from the desk, which makes no sense, considering the floor needs mopping, but again, he's drunk. Roger remembers that Jack arrived when Kate did, and asks if he knows her at all. If there's anything I hate more than a nasty drunk it's a drunk who vacillates between nasty and nice. Guess which kind Roger is? His voice is all soft, now. "She's got some kind of weird thing for my kid. First, she shows up at the infirmary and gave him blood." Then I screw up my tenses. I do did. "But then when he goes missing, she comes to me and she says, 'Don't worry. He's gonna be okay'. I'm gonna tell you something, man. I'm beginning to think that she's got something to do with this." Don't think, Roger. You're not used to it. "I should go to Horace. Report her. What do you think?"

Arms folded, Jack approaches his co-worker. "I think, Roger, that... uh... that you've had a hell of a day, and that's given you a very good excuse to go out and get drunk. Maybe that's put some -- some crazy ideas into your head. I know that woman, Kate. She's my friend, and she would never do anything to hurt your son." That was a little reveal-y, but I suppose Jack can always claim the guy's a drunk and misunderstood him. Roger at first seems mollified, then cowed. The important thing is, he reads Jack loud and clear and says, "Sure," then slinks off to his cart and rolls it out of the classroom.

In the van with Miles, Hurley asks Dr. Chang what he does at the Orchid. Chang will only say it's classified. Hurley makes a big deal about how this must mean he can't tell his wife or even his kids. Chang says, "I have a 3-month old son so, no, I haven't told him." Hurley congratulates him about the baby then asks his name. When Chang says it's "Miles," Hurley goes on about how it's a small world, since that's their driver's name, too. Miles wishes he were dead so he could tell Hurley, "Don't make me turn this van around," without his daddy issues hearing him. Hurley asks if perhaps Chang is a jazz fan and named the baby for Miles Davis. Chang says, "My wife is. I like country." Miles makes the "Oh great, I finally meet my father and he's so LAME I WANT TO DIE," face.

Hurley keeps going. "So you two have been here for three years now. Must be pretty tight, huh?" I wait for Miles to snap, "Why, because we're Asian?" but instead, he just says that he and the good douche-ster don't travel in the same circles. Chang's sort of adorably clueless when he says, "I wasn't aware there were circles." Not even the Circle of Trust? Huh. I knew that was a hippie concoction. Hurley suggests they all get together for a beer sometime, and then Miles has to drive blind, because his eyes have rolled out of his head, jumped out the window, and back to the Orchid, found the well, thrown themselves in, pushed the frozen donkey wheel, and returned to SoCal, circa 2009. Chang doesn't answer. Instead, he asks Miles to stop the van for a moment. He hops out and approaches a gate disguised by vines and pushes it open to reveal yet another construction site. The SWAN! Once he's back in the van, they drive through the gates; the guard waves them on. Miles parks beside the big dig. Chang hops out and tells them not to wait. He'll catch a ride back with Radzinsky. The wee Miles who's been hanging out on my purple Swingline stapler says, Aren't you even going to kiss me goodbye, Daddy? Chang can't hear you, dear, but don't worry. I bet he'll buy you a present.

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